Page 119 of One Night Only
Joy laughs, wrapping an arm around me. “Oh, I just adore you.”
“I adore you, too.”
With her arm still around me, Joy gazes out over the fields. “I never thought I’d get to see the day my boy was in love,” she begins wistfully. “He was always so happy being the…playboy.” She rolls her eyes. “Gosh, I hated seeing that. But as his momma,I always supported by him, y’know? If he was happy, I was happy. Or at least, IpretendedI was happy, but oh, how I worried.” She shakes her head, sighing heavily. “Deep down, I truly feel like he was lonely. It started when he went to Canada. He was so far away. All on his own for the first time. He was miserable.” She sniffs a laugh. “I don’t think he’ll ever admit it, but I could tell.”
“Moms just know.” I nod. “God, sometimes it feels like my mom knows things about me before I even do.”
Joy winks like she’s part of some mom’s only secret society. “It’s a mom thing.”
I smile, looking down at my glass as that all too familiar panic tries to consume me.
“Do you want children?”
“I do.” I look up at her, and I don’t know if I’m imagining it, but there’s just something in her eyes, a nurturing look that makes me feel so safe enough that I can tell her all my secrets. “I don’t know if I can have them though.”
Joy doesn’t say anything. She doesn’t gasp, or frown, or anything. Just continues watching me, waiting for me to speak, that soft, tender smile hinting at her lips.
“I know Dallas hasn’t told you about….” I trail off, placing a hand against my chest and swallowing hard. “I had breast cancer.”
Joy’s brows arch higher in genuine surprise.
“I’m in remission,” I assure her.
“B-but you’re so young.”
“Yeah. I used to think breast cancer was something only old ladies got.” I sniff a laugh. “How wrong I was…”
Joy removes her arm around me, instead grabbing my hand and holding it tight, and I tell her everything. I tell her about my treatment and what happened with Luke. I tell her about freezing my eggs before I started chemotherapy and how I’m still in medical menopause. I tell her about the ongoing hormonal treatment and the constant and crippling fear ofrecurrence. And she holds my hand the entire time, listening to every single word I say… maybe even hearing some of the things I don’t say.
“For the first time, since cancer, I’m finally happy,” I confess. “But that’s the problem. The happier I am, the more scared I am that it’s going to come back and take everything again. I used to think that if it came back then, oh well—” I shrug. “I’ve done it before and I can do it again. And if I can’t beat it again, then maybe it’s just my time.”
Joy squeezes my hand at that.
“But now,” I continue. “Now I have Dallas. Now I’m actually happy. I can imagine a future, and for the first time, it’s beautiful. But… I’m scared it’s all going to get taken away from me.”
“Oh, sweetie!” Joy pulls me in for a bone-crushing hug, and it’s only then that I realize I’m crying. “I want you to listen to me right now.” Joy pulls back, holding me at bay and looking me directly in my eyes. “I know my son, better than anyone. He loves big and he loveshard. And I need you to know that whatever happens, good, bad, ugly, indifferent, Dallas is going to keep on loving you with all that he has. And he will fight tooth and nail for the people he loves most. But you gotta let him fight for you, hon.”
I manage a watery smile, my tears falling freely. “I love your son. So much.”
“I know you do, sweetheart.” Joy smiles, her own tears reflecting the dull afternoon light in her eyes. “He’s a hard one not to love.”
CHAPTER 49
DALLAS
The atmosphere in the locker room is electric for our first game back after the holiday break. We’re playing Robbie’s old team, the St. Paul Lions, for the first time this season, and we’re determined to take the W for Robbie’s sake.
There’s some serious beef between Robbie and his old teammate, Ben Harris, after Robbie broke the guy’s jaw during their pre-season opener, which resulted in him being released immediately and forced to face a Player Safety investigation. The guy almost lost hockey altogether, but thankfully he was allowed to play, and our GM Chris Garret quickly snapped him up.
Harris has been chirping all over social media for the last few days, ready to stick it to Mason once and for all on the ice. And I know tonight’s game is going to get messy. But I’m here for it. And, by the looks of Robbie next to me, jumping up and down and stretching out his neck like a heavyweight boxer about to step into the ring for a title fight, it looks like he’s ready to bring out his inner enforcer tonight.
“You ready to go spend some time in the box, son?” I joke, clapping my hands together to psych him up.
“Fuck yeah,” Robbie yells. “Keller’s going to be so horny by the time the final siren sounds,” he murmurs for my ears only.
I shake my head, chuckling under my break. “Dude.”
He shrugs, winking at me.
