Page 137 of Marked By the Pack
“Not that part of the conversation,” he said.
“Oh?” What else had I said last night? I’d been very distracted by the coin I was searching for. And by him. Mostly by him. We walked down the sidewalk toward his house while I thought. “Are we talking about how I asked you to bite me again? Because I really liked that.”
He tried to hide his smile as he unlocked his door. “I was actually still talking about you being jealous of Kebe.” He stepped to the side so I could walk in first.
I hurried past him so he couldn’t see me cringe. God, why were we still talking about this? I was a little mortified that I’d felt compelled to spy. Especially since he’d just tried to reassure me last night. And I didn’t really know what to say.
He started walking up the steps.
Apparently he didn’t know what to say to me either. Where was he going?
I followed him up the stairs and toward the room that was an exact replica of the room we’d first met in. He unlocked it and walked in. And then he sat down on the couch.
I just stood there, awkwardly staring at him.
“I get it, Emma,” he said.
Wait.“You do?” I sat down next to him.
“Do you have any idea how jealous I was when you moved to town and immediately started dating Bennett?”
I nodded. I had a good idea. “Probably about as jealous as I feel now.”
“Except you reciprocated his feelings. You let him kiss you. Touch you. It felt like my heart was on fire.”
“You were pretending to be someone else, Callum. What was I supposed to do?”
“So you dated him to make me jealous?”
I shook my head. “You’re infuriating.”
“I’d say the same about you, Emma. I think you dated Bennett just to torture me. To push me. To find out how I really felt about you. To see if the memory of us haunted me as much as it haunted you. You were testing me. But we don’t need any more tests.”
“I know, I’m sorry about Kebe. I don’t know what made me follow you…”
“I’m not upset with you.” He grabbed my hand. “I kept thinking about our conversation because I wanted to find the root of the problem. I want to prove to you that you have nothing to be jealous of. And I think I know what’s wrong. It’s not even about Kebe. I think you’re scared. Because I left you once. And you’re worried I’m going to leave you again.”
I opened my mouth and then closed it. Just thinking about that moment ten years ago when he’d disappeared… He was probably right. I was terrified of him leaving me. “The thought of losing you makes me feel like I can’t breathe.”
“Emma, I’m never going to leave you again. Ever.”
I felt my bottom lip start to tremble. I didn’t even know I was still holding on to that pain. That was the problem. Right there. Because I fell in love with him ten years ago and he’d disappeared on me. I couldn’t do that again.
“I need you to trust me,” he said and put his hand on the side of my face. “Those ten years we were apart? You were on my mind the whole time. I was trying to learn how to control my cravings. So that it would be safe for us to be together. All I did was think of you. The love I have for you isn’t something that just stops. You’re in my veins, Emma.”
I nodded as I blinked through my tears.
“We have different definitions of forever. But I want to be on the same page from this moment on. I don’t want you to ever think I’m choosing to leave you. I’ve put a lot of thought into this. There is no cure for me.”
I wasn’t so sure about that…
“But if you still feel the same way in another year…I’ll change you.”
“Really?”
“I’ll show you every side of what changing will mean. You’ll have all the information you need to make a decision. I really don’t think you’re going to want to turn. But I trust you’ll make the right decision for you. For us. Our definitions of forever should be the same. And if you want it to be an actual forever…I’m not going to prevent it.”
I threw my arms around him. He was agreeing to change me. In a year. I wasn’t sure he’d need to change me, or if he’d want to change after I found the cure. But I wanted to be on the same page. He was right about everything. The worry of our forevers not aligning. The worry of him leaving me again. It had all made my stomach twist into knots. And he’d just untangled all of it.
