Page 47 of Caged Heart
We stayed on the floor until Ares groaned as his phone rang.
"It might be the hospital. Sorry, Goldilocks." He whispered as he kissed my neck.
"It's okay," I cleared my throat. "I'll check on Monica and see if she needs anything."
"Okay."
I stood, and before I walked away, Ares wrapped his long fingers around my wrist as he looked up at me through his lashes.
"We still have to talk. Don't run away from telling me what happened. I told you, no one will ever make you cry again."
We both knew what he was talking about, Sarge, but I didn't want to tell Ares because I didn't want him to know what Sarge asked me for. The money he asked for and said that my mother needed it because she hadn't been able to leave the hospital. The sadness and pain that I felt over the battle of going to see her and seeing it as another scam is what was happening in my head. The constant battle.
"I can't, Ares," I answered honestly.
"What are you afraid of, Carmen? What do you think I'll do if I find out?" He asked.
"I'm afraid if you get too close and see too deep, you won't like what you see," I confessed. "It's not a pretty picture."
Ares stood and grabbed my jaw in his hand as he forgot his phone. My eyes widened as he squeezed tighter.
"I don't want pretty, Carmen. I want you. You're used to being disappointed and people walking away from you. I won't do that to you. I won't leave you alone, nor will someone take me away from you. I told you, so you have to trust me. The pattern that adults put in our lives doesn't mean we have to follow it. We don't have to do what they did. We're not them, and they're not people who deserved us."
My heart felt like someone was squeezing it tightly. "You don't understand, Ares. What if I turn out to be like her? What then?"
"Do you want to be like her, Goldilocks?"
"No," I shook my head. "I don't want to hurt people, and I've never wanted to do that."
"You don't even realize how beautiful you are inside, Carmen. I told you I don't need pretty because I see you in more ways than that. Even before you looked my way, I always looked in yours. Maybe it was that both our hearts were trampled on as children or that I saw my fate right before me. I don't fucking know. I don't have a fucking clue as to why, but there was always something drawing me in your direction, and even if you never saw me," he shrugged. "Nah, it would've happened because you saw me, Carmen, just as much as I saw you."
My face grew hot, and the shyness I hadn't had in a while fully bloomed. My eyes looked away to his hand over my wrist, and then slowly, I looked back up into eyes that looked like they loved me right back, but was it what I wanted to see, or was it true?
"I," I began to say, then stopped. I looked down again, but Ares lifted my face to him again.
"That night we hooked up, we were drunk, but something changed. Well, everything, and now, Goldilocks, I knew I was right to always look your way. To let you come to me when you were ready. You kissed me, and my mind went quiet. You're my peace, Carmen, and I want to be your chaos. The man that has and will continue to fuck up your world to make it stable for you. I know you saw shit you never need to see, but it happened, and I'm sorry. I should let you go, let you find someone good and right. Someone who doesn't bathe in darkness and fully accepts it like a three-piece Armani suit completed with engraved cufflinks for a black tie affair. But baby, I can't do that. I can't let you go. Especially not after you told me you loved me. I know what you want to hear but wait for me, Carmen. Wait for me because when I can say it to you, baby, I will ensure the skies and Mount Olympus hear it."
"Ares…" His name felt smooth against my tongue, slightly cool. I licked my lips as if savoring its sweetness.
"My pretty girl." He leaned in, kissing all my fears and stress away. There wasn't anything else I could think about but Ares. My body shuddered as he pulled me close and linked our fingers together.
Telling him I loved him wasn't wrong, and I would never doubt that again. I loved Ares Wolfgang. That quickly.
Chapter34
Ares
When the hospital called the first time, I didn't pick up, but I called back, and they told me about Mars waking up. I told the girls and refused for them to come, but they came anyway. Now, here we were in the car driving towards the hospital. My eyes ventured back to Monica through the rearview mirror.
"Stop looking at me, Ares. I'm fine." She reassured me.
"Are you sure you won't trigger anything seeing him? I know he didn't want to do anything, but I need to know if you'll lose your mind before him."
Monica shook her head. "I won't. I told you, I know he would have never done that to me just because."
"Okay," I answered, but I didn't fully believe her. Not because I didn't know Monica and her thoughts but because I didn't want her to do that before him.
Mars and his confession have had me rethinking and reevaluating many events in our lives. My anger and rage toward him mean nothing now because of what he did for me. I've always wanted my older brother to step up; he did in more ways than one, but I didn't know. It bothered me so much that all my thoughts were on replaying every scenario differently.
