Page 28 of Euphoria
“I don’t think she’s going to call us. She’s trying to show us she can make it without us for the week. That she can do this without us like she’s been doing before but she doesn’t get it, it was easier because we were kids who had no control, no right to shit,” I say.
“True.” Phoenix sits back as he flips through channels. This is what he does when he’s thinking idly. I didn’t think he’d still be doing that. I pick up my acoustic and I place my notebook on the side of me. I shut my eyes, place my feet on the coffee table, and lean my head back.
I say nothing as my mind wanders and the music comes to me. Not the lyrics but the notes for the guitar, the rhythm. I already know what I’m going to play on the drums and on the piano too. I hum it but nothing comes.
“You’re still having a hard time finding the lyrics?” Phoenix says.
“Should I be surprised that you know that?” I ask, not opening my eyes.
“I know everything plus; it was in the tabloids. Said that you had a co-writer who said they did all the work?” He says.
I right my head, and I look at him. “Yes, I slept with her and she got mad because I didn’t want to make our relationship public. You know me, even though I’m in the limelight, I don’t like to do all that. It’s not me.”
Phoenix nods. “I know. You were never the type to flaunt until it came to Bambi. That’s one girl you could never keep quiet about. You talked about her more than I did. I know more than half of your songs are about her. She probably is going to act clueless.”
I snort. “She would. It’s not Bambi if she doesn’t deny something. Plus, how did you know it’s about her?”
Phoenix cocks his brow. “I know every part of her. I can shut my eyes and envision her body, although you’re going to have to update your songs because she’s not that girl anymore. She’s a grown woman now. She looks delicious now.”
I grin. “That she does. She filled out really well.”
Phoenix nods, agreeing with me. I laid back again and this time; I concentrated on the first time I saw her again. The look in her eyes, the intense feeling of love that I once closed down open up again. The lyrics come to me.
I don’t deserve you… Every part of you shouldn’t be mine but it is.
The epitome of beautiful is in the shape of a small woman with a big heart.
Love overflows even when I’m not sure what to do with it.
I had a dream… You were here.
Everything was clear.
Your love was near...again.
The epitome of beautiful is in the shape of a small woman with a big heart.
