Page 65 of Blinded By The Sun
King
I’m officially drunk. The last time I was tipsy, but this here is something else. I just know that I am, and I love it. After Ciro stopped playing, we all sat around and began drinking, minus Kenna. Ciro isn’t as drunk as me, but I watch him as he talks to Boston about something. He’s sitting opposite of me as we have a makeshift bonfire in Alex’s backyard.
“You think they’re doing this to distract us from the fact that we got shot at or what?” Kenna asks, leaning in.
I nod as I take another sip of my drink. “Yeah, I definitely think so. Also, what is in this? It tastes so good.” I say to her.
Kenna chuckles and rubs her belly. “It’s Elani’s talent plus she made it a bit heavy since she’s trying to calm her nerves. You doing okay?” She asks me.
I shrug. “The truth?”
“Yeah, the truth.” Kenna responds.
“I’m not sure. I feel fine but I know it’ll take me a couple days to not see my life flash before my eyes and you know what was the last thing I thought about before I closed my eyes?”
“What?”
“I thought about Ciro and how much I didn’t want to leave. Not just because I feel like I won’t have another chance to be with him, but because I wanted that. I feel like that makes me selfish. I want more time with him. I want to talk to him and be with him longer than what I’ve been given.”
“That is sweet. I totally understand you because I worry about Alex all the time,” Kenna says and looks at her husband. I follow her line of vision and I see the way he automatically looks at her as if he knows when she calls him. He winks at her and it puts a smile on her face. Kenna looks back at me. “To lose him is like I’m losing myself so trust me when I say that I so get you, girl. I really do.”
I smile. “Thank you for that. I’m happy to know that I’m not crazy for wanting Ciro that bad.”
“Girl, he’s your chosen. Your true love or whatever. The man that did everything to get back to you. Another chance in another lifetime for you. You’re in love and most likely devoted. Don’t beat yourself up for feeling how you do because honey, let me tell you, before Alex, I was with someone who bullied me. Someone who took control of my life and I thought I was content, but come to find out, I knew nothing at all. I didn’t understand what love was really about. Love is about that man of yours willing to give you what you want and what you need. He looks at your needs first before his and that’s why you devote yourself to him, because you recognized it long before you admitted it out loud.”
I wipe away the tears that fall out of my eyes. “You took the words right out of my mouth. I didn’t know how to even say it.” I open my mouth to say more, but Kenna’s eyes flash.
“Ooh! He’s kicking.” she says and touches her belly.
I stare down at it. “Kicking?” I ask.
She nods and smiles. “Yeah, our baby boy is letting us know that he is well and alive. Not that we didn’t know it.”
I look up at her and back down at her belly. “Can I feel?” I ask.
Kenna nods. I hesitate at first, but then I reach out. Everything becomes silent for me as I feel her baby boy kicking. I giggle, astonished at the wonders of life, but then I grow sad. I touch my belly, feeling empty suddenly. “You okay?” Kenna asks.
I clear my throat and move my hands. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just gotta use the bathroom. Be right back.” I say.
I scramble out of my chair and make my way inside the house. I go to the kitchen and figure out where the water bottles are. After drinking one, I place it down and take a breath. “Dammit, Ciro…” I say to myself. I should know better by now that calling his name, even if it’s a whisper, he’ll come.
I feel his heat behind me as he stirs up all kinds of emotions in me. With the alcohol, I feel free of all the things my mind could conjure up. Ciro traps me in his arms as he leans in and places his palms flat on the counter. I stare at his tattooed hands, the veins that are so sexy to me and the fact that he always has his pinky and forefinger rings on. I lift my hands up and place them on his forearms. I slowly slip my hands down until I reach his hands. I plant my fingers in between his and sigh as I lean my head back on his chest. I take his right hand with mine and place it over my flat belly. I rub it and Ciro takes over as he continues to rub my belly. “You know that you never have to call me for me to come to you, right?” he says.
“What do you mean?” I ask.
Ciro kisses the side of my head and then dips his head further down to my neck. He bites hard and I wince. I keep my moan in trying not to be loud. “I mean that I know you. I know when you want something. It didn’t need to be six months or a year because you’re like an open book. Your emotions call to me when you look at me and remember, I never take my eyes off you.”
“I love you,” I say.
“I love you more,” Ciro responds.
“Cir…”
“Yeah?”
“I want a baby,” I admit to him.
“Yeah? You want me to give you my seed. Plant my seed so deep inside of your body, it bypasses everything else and becomes part of your soul?”
I shudder at his words and when he nips my exposed skin courtesy of my tank top. “Yes, please, sir, give me every part of you. I’m all yours.”
Ciro chuckles softly. “You’ve always been mine.”
