Page 73 of Blinded By The Sun
King
Ciro has been acting weird since the day before when he left me at the hair salon. Not typical weird, but weird for him. Once I opened my eyes not too long ago and turned to reach out for him, he wasn’t there. I look up and there he is with a cup of coffee in one hand and nothing else on but his satin striped dark blue pajama pants. He looks so beautiful as the sun rises with him; I don’t hesitate as I reach out for my cell and I take a picture of him like this. His hair that was now a bit past his shoulders in wet waves meaning he just got out of the shower, and all his back tattoos that scream his personality. He is a walking art piece. I take more for good measure and then I just watch him.
Ciro sighs, “I need to bring you somewhere to meet someone,” he says.
“I always wonder how you know when I’m awake or watching you,” I answer.
Ciro snickers. “Because I’ve trained myself to hear things that nobody else wants to hear. They’d rather see it than hear but I’d rather hear it first and then come face to face with it. Now go shower. We’ll get you some coffee on our way there.”
“What aren’t you telling me, Ciro?”
Ciro runs his free hand through his hair. “If I tell you now, you’ll bolt. So let me do this for you because I know how important it is. You need this more than you say out loud.”
“Need what?” I ask.
“I’ve been thinking…” He starts off.
“Have you slept?”
He shakes his head. “I can’t sleep until the immediate enemy or rather trouble is out of the way. Anyway, don’t change the subject. I was thinking about how much you really don’t say out loud, but you say with your actions. The love that you give and the enormous heart that you have… If I don’t do this for you, one day you’ll wake up and resent me for it. Now, even if you resent me, it doesn’t mean I’ll let it go on for forever, but it also doesn’t mean that I am an uncontrollable dickhead, that I can’t comprehend these things. I may not be some kind of fortune teller, but baby, this will haunt you for a long time. Now, go shower and meet me outside.”
“You won’t wait for me?” I ask.
“If you come out of the bathroom dripping wet like you do every time after a shower, we won’t go where we need to go because I’ll put you into a sex coma.”
I shake my head but a smile creeps on my face thinking about the way he touched me last night. “Can you at least look at me? I want to see your beautiful face.”
Ciro doesn’t hesitate to turn and look my way. What an amazing human to stare at. I take him in, and he lets me. After a moment, Ciro walks over to me as I sit up and he leans down pulling me into a crazy kiss. A kiss that wakes me up and chases any traces of sleep that I had left. I’ll follow Ciro wherever he wants me to follow because I know he would never steer me wrong.
* * *
There is a nervousness that grasps me tight when we step out of the car. Ciro holds my hand as we walk into a prestigious coffee joint. The white and black theme is beautiful, aesthetically pleasing. It makes you want to sit and read a book or just drink coffee.
Once we get inside, I stop in my tracks. The café is empty except for a man who is sitting down by himself and a barista who is making the coffees behind the bar. The man looks up at me and I know him. He was there the other day, my father. I take a step back and move to hide behind Ciro. What is he doing here? Does he want to kill me? Why does he want to meet me now?
“Don’t be afraid, baby, I’m here… You wanted to meet him right? Just to sort of look at him?” Ciro says to me, a soft whisper.
I look up at him and I can tell that he sees the front that I put up before break. The many years of the scared little girl is resurfacing. The insecurities, the lies, and the abandonment is in the forefront, a side that I hide pretty well. “Don’t leave.” I beg him.
Ciro shuts his eyes and opens them back up again. He shakes his head. “I won’t. I’ll be right beside you.” He reassures me.
“Promise me.” I say to him.
“My word is law.” He reminds me. I nod to him and he walks with me, still halfway hiding from my father.
When we get close enough, my father stands up. He has his hands in front of him clasped so tight, I can see the whiteness of his knuckles. “Kingsley…” He mumbles my name. It’s like he doesn’t realize he’s said it and then he shocks me by apologizing. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have called your name out like that. I just, I’m so happy to finally see you face to face again after so many years. Having a picture of you doesn’t do you justice.” He gives me a sad smile.
“Why?” I ask. “Why did you leave me there? Why didn’t you want me?” I ask him.
He looks shocked by my question. “I’ve always wanted you, but I couldn’t risk your life. I couldn’t let them know you were alive or else they would’ve taken you from me. They would’ve killed you eventually, like they did your mother. I’m sorry that I left you there, but it was the only guarantee I had. That hiding in plain sight wouldn’t have gotten you caught up in anything.”
“You told uncle Stannis that you didn’t want me. He told me you wanted me to be a whore. He said that you didn’t care about me as much as your other family and that my mother was nothing to you. She was a mistake… I was a mistake.” I whisper.
He shakes his head. “No.” he says with anger laced in his tone. His eyes fill with tears, but he blinks them back. “Neither you or your mother were ever a mistake. I loved you both so much that I had to let you go. Your mother fought to hide you from her family, and she did the best she could. She did everything we did. What do you mean I wanted you to be a whore? You were never one to begin with.” His brows crease.
“Do you have any idea how she came to be with me, Czar? Your brother traded her to me in exchange for his life.”
The blow causes my father to sit down. He looks so confused and angry all in the same breath. He shakes his head again and runs a hand over his face. I watch him as he does this; I look so much like him, it’s scary. His facial expressions are mine, his nose, his brows, how they’re shaped and even the ears, they’re his. I blink. My father, I remember him now. The one time I tricked Macy into playing hide and seek, I ran by my uncle’s office and I saw him… I saw my father. He turned to the cracked door and instead of seeing anger in his face; he smiled. He gave me such a warm smile that I went to sleep with one on my face.
