Page 71 of A Convenient Secret
Good, that’s the safe zone for us. “Zoya had a meltdown, probably just tired after her swimming class. Zach said the Math worksheet is an insult to his intelligence. Now they are sleeping peacefully.”
His expression softens, and a smile tugs at his lips. “They are great kids.”
“They are wonderful.” I recall the heart-squeezing moment from earlier when watching Zoya.
His jaw ticks, and the smile disappears, replaced with a deep line on his forehead. “I can’t have her fuck them up.”
“Who?”
He looks at me, pain seeping through his gaze. “Their mother.”
I wait for a moment to see if he elaborates, holding his gaze to let him know I’m here to listen.
He opens his mouth a few times before he turns his back to me. I’m pretty sure the moment of almost sharing is gone.
“I don’t think I ever truly loved her. She fit my five-year plan and, as much as I hate to admit it, she tricked me.” He watches the city for a moment, rolling the water bottle around the stony surface of the balustrade.
“She got married again and has money now. She wants shared custody.” His words float out into the night sky, descending on the city as if they were any other chatter of the night.
“But she abandoned them.”
I can’t sit anymore. It feels frivolous to sit during this topic.
“Twice.” He snorts.
“You can’t be sure she is serious this time. Poor babies.”
I move to stand beside him. What kind of a cruel woman would just test to see if she enjoys motherhood and then bail? Twice? It certainly puts my mother’s absence into a much more favorable light. Jesus.
“Oh, I don’t trust her. She had her chances, but she is now taking this to court, and it’s not my decision. I should have erased her from their birth certificate the first time she came for a payout.”
“What do you mean?”
He chuckles humorlessly. “Usually, her sudden awakening of motherly genes happens around the time she needs money.”
“That’s horrible. You have to pay to keep your kids safe from a woman who uses them for her own gain.”
“Pretty fucked-up, isn’t it?” He leans on his elbows.
“No court would ever side with her.” I don’t know the legal system well enough to make such a statement. And I know common sense is not always what wins.
“She has a stable household now, and enough money to prove she is a fit parent. No court would give her Zoya and Zach full-time, but they might allowvisitation rights. Courts tend to side with mothers. And then what? A year later she will ask for some days, and… And then one day she changes her mind, and they will remember.” He turns to me, his eyes full of desperation and anger. “This time, they will remember she abandoned them. Yet again.”
“Declan…” I reach to squeeze his arm. It feels like such a pointless gesture, but I’m at a loss for words or actions of comfort.
“What if she’s changed?” He sighs. “What if I’d be depriving them of their mother?”
My heart breaks a little for this beautiful family. “She proved the opposite. I don’t know the woman, but I can imagine she had all the resources to have all the help in the world. Regardless of how unhappy she could have been, she made a choice, and those kids should not pay any more for her choices. Even if she feels it was a mistake. Which I doubt, because she doesn’t have it in her if she managed to leave them in the first place. That’s not something she could just turn on.”
I realize I have no authority to judge her, but I do anyway.
“You fight for them like a mama bear.” He reaches to push my glasses up my nose, and I shiver.
“I love them, Declan.” It might be ridiculous, but it’s true.
“You truly are perfect.”
The familiar charged tension sneaks between us, and I scramble to move us out of that territory. “Just remember my fajitas.”
