Page 4 of Thanks for the Friendship
“Anyway, what did I miss?” Reagan asks, conveniently changing the subject away from the reason she’s late.
Gabby fills her in on our discussion about me ending things with Jordan. When I think about it, I can almost feel my heartstrings being pulled.
I pick up my phone and find Jordan’s number.
Hey, you. Can I come over tonight? At dinner with my roommates, but I can come straight from here.
Here we go. It’s time to just rip off the Band-Aid.
“Okay, I texted him,” I announce, placing my phone down on the table. “Now I need a drink.”
The remainder of dinner is spent going over plans for Theo’s birthday party, which of course is being held at my (our) house, my eighteen-year-old self would be in shock right now. I suppose this is what growth is all about—doing hard things. And how do I get to end a successful day? By crushing a man I care about. Being an adult is hard.
Chapter Two
As I drive to Jordan’s condo, I replay what I’m going to say to him. Honestly, he shouldn’t be completely shocked because we’ve had discussions about our relationship status on a few occasions. They usually end with him promising he’ll make me fall in love with him and kissing me like I’ve never been kissed. Yeah—that’s another dilemma. Our chemistry is pretty intense. And he’s so gorgeous, with his wavy brown hair, mysterious brown eyes and a smile that could make the most miserable person happy. Kind of like Luke Perry in his Dylan McKay days. And as Reagan would say, he’s super dreamy.
Anyway, I can’t continue on like this. I’m a woman who’s focused, confident, and always willing to go after what I want. Well, most of the time. Settling for a relationship that I have doubts about isn’t me. I don’t want to hurt another man—but it’ll be far worse if I wait much longer.
I’m lucky enough to find a parking space right in front of Jordan’s building, which almost never happens. I’ll take this as a sign that I’m making the right decision. After pulling into the spot, I sit in my car for a few minutes. This isn’t going to be easy, but it’s so long overdue. I take a slow deep breath and head inside.
The door flies open just as I’m about to knock.
“Hi, beautiful,” Jordan says, his voice deep and sultry. I force a smile as I take in his appearance. Jordan is so handsome. A former Abercrombie and Fitch model, his hair is wild, and his brown eyes sparkle behind his dark-rimmed glasses. He’s wearing a pair of Adidas joggers, with a plain gray T-shirt that fits perfectly in all the right places. He holds out his arms and pulls me into his body. I follow his lead, wrapping my arms around him, and let out a sigh, knowing what’s to come.
“This is a good surprise,” he murmurs into my hair. “I wasn’t expecting to see you until this weekend.”
I pull away and press my lips together.
“This couldn’t wait any longer,” I say, clearing my throat.
Jordan’s eyes grow wide, and he lets his arms fall to his sides. I’m sure he already knows what’s coming—but that doesn’t make it any easier.
“Do you want something to drink?” he asks.
Hmm … that’s not a bad idea. “Sure.”
He leads me to the kitchen where he takes out a bottle of red wine.
I lean against the counter but don’t say anything. We’re both quiet as he pours two glasses and then leads me to the leather sectional couch. I sit down next to him and place my hand on his shoulder.
There’s no point in dragging this out, so I speak up, breaking the uncomfortable silence.
“Jordan, I’m so sorry.”
He holds up his hands to stop me. “Lila, you don’t have to explain. I knew this was coming—you’ve been distant for a while.”
I chew on my lip as I try to organize the words in my head. “I wish I could give you what you’re looking for. But lately I’ve been feeling like I’m coming to a crossroads. Maybe I just need to be on my own for a while to figure out what I need in my life.”
He nods slowly. “I understand. And I sure as hell don’t want to continue on this path if you’re not feeling it.”
I nod.
“Although, we are good together,” he says, brushing my cheek with his finger.
Oh, I really wish he wouldn’t do things like that. I remove my hand from his shoulder and take a long sip of my wine. Is it bad that I want him to pull me into his lap in the midst of ending our relationship?
“We are good together, which is why I’ve struggled with this decision,” I agree. “It would be easier to stay and not let anything change, but that’s not fair to either of us.”
