Page 14 of Lovetown, USA
Nadia dates like men do, and I’m not even mad at it. I aspire to it, actually. She’s part of the reason I’m so savage now, which makes what she says next even more shocking.
“MaybeIshould move to Lovetown.”
I scrunch my face up. “You can’t be serious.”
“Maybe I am.”
“This place is unhinged. It’s…the gas station sells heart-shaped pizza, for fuck’s sake.”
She smiles whimsically, staring off into space like she’s picturing it. “That actually sounds adorable.”
“Bitch, it’s not! I’m stuck in a fucking Hallmark movie.”
She shrugs. “Maybe that’s exactly where you need to be.”
I narrow my eyes at my best friend. “Don’t start.”
“I’m just saying. Maybe the universe dropped you into Cupid’s butt hole on purpose.”
I roll my eyes. “I don’t need love, Nadia. I need to get my damn life back.”
“Well,Ithink you need therapy, but we’ve talked about that.”
I hold up my middle finger.
“You’re stubborn. You’re emotionally unavailable—“
“Wouldn’tyoube?” I challenge.
“You’re independent,” she continues. “And you’re a little crazy. But you’re also smart, and beautiful, and fine as fuck. And I feel like you deserve love, even if you’re pretending you don’t want it. So, I’m choosing to believe this is a karmic intervention. Girl, even the universe is sick of your shit.”
I chuckle at that. “I’m not joining the love cult. It would be different if I just happened to meet a man in the wild. This shit here is too choreographed. That’s not how love works.”
“Whatever.” She lifts a spoon of something to her mouth to taste. “Needs salt. Alright, let me go feed this negro and get him the hell out my house. But I need one thing from you.”
“What?”
“Promise me you’ll keep an open mind out there. I really want you to enjoy the full experience no matter what happens.”
I twist my lips in irritation. “And what does that look like to you?”
“Don’t fight it. Just go with it. Say yes to things. Live in every corny moment. Don’t be…you know…you.”
“Ugh. You’re annoying.”
She smiles. “Say it.”
“Fine. I promise I’ll keep an open mind.”
“Good. Love you bestie!”
“Mm hm, love you too.”
We sign off, and I close my laptop and flop backwards on the bed with a dramatic sigh.
Of course my best friend, the eternal optimist, would force me into a deal like this. Of course she’d make the erroneous, unsupported assumption that there’s any fun to be had in this place.
There’s nothing here but fraud.
