Page 69 of Fear of Love
I didn’t hear back about my article for days and thought it wasn’t good enough. I let it slide until a friend of mine that was interning with me sent me a link. A link tomypiece but with my mentor’s name stamped on it. What made it worse was that it was right on the front page of the magazine.
When I tried to tell one of the head editors that the article was mine, there was nothing they could do. When I confronted my “so-called mentor” about it, she just shrugged and said,“Sometimes you have to take advantage or you’ll be left in the dust.”
I was a stepping stone in someone else’s career. I refused to be that person.
“I won’t push you to do it but just think about it.” Josie reached over and squeezed my arm.
“Thanks. I’ll… I’ll let you know in a couple of days.” Before we could say anything else, our names were called.
Turning, I found Tasha and Mila walking toward us, their boyfriends a step behind them. I couldn’t stop my eyes from glancing to see if someone else was with them. My heart sank a little when I didn’t see him. Pushing the feeling aside, I plastered on a smile.
“You look gorgeous,” I said as I hugged Tasha. Her baby blue dress contrasted her tan skin perfectly, her blonde hair pulled up into a cute messy ponytail. Standing next to Trevor, the two were honestly one of the prettiest couples.
We all looked great, but Mila stole the show. Her deep emerald green dress was stunning, her curly brown hair going down her back. Her dark skin shimmered under the light. She was radiating.
“You have to tell me where you got this dress,” I said, eyes glued to her dress. “It’s gorgeous.”
As Mila and I talked, Wyatt slid up next to Josie and tugged her into his side. Once again, I was the seventh wheel. I stood there as everyone’s significant others wrapped their arms around them. It was painfully obvious I was single. I knocked back the rest of my wine before I turned and asked the bartender for another.
Slowly, one by one, my friends left to go mingle, leaving me at the bar. I leaned back against the counter, wine in hand as I people-watched. I felt extremely out of place. I wasn’t dating anyone from the team, and I really only knew the guys.
As I debated if I should saddle up next to one of the girls for the rest of the night, I felt someone slide up next to me.
“What’s a beautiful woman like you doing over here by yourself?”
My lips quirked up at the lame pickup line. I turned my head to find a familiar guy smirking at me, eyes moving from my face down to my chest. He wasn’t even sly about it either. I couldn’t remember his name for the life of me, but I knew he was a player on the team.
“Coming to keep me company?” I asked. I leaned back on my elbow and took another sip of my wine.
“Of course. Can’t let you stand here alone.” He smirked. “I’m Max.”
“Lydia.”
“Beautiful name.” I had to hold in my snort at his words. They were corny as hell. I didn’t need to know Max well enough to know he only wanted to get laid.
He was attractive, I’d give him that. Dark brown hair that was shaved on the sides but longer on top. He was clean-shaven, which showed off his nice jawline. But when I looked at his brown eyes, all I could see was a pair of hazel ones.
I wasn’t interested. I wasn’t going to lead the poor guy on all night, but as I went to tell him that, something caught my attention, or more like someone. I knew who it was immediately. I’d recognize that body anywhere.
The moment Landon walked into the room all the background noise disappeared, including Max beside me. My mouth dried at the sight of him. He was clad in tan dress pants and a dark blue button-up shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his forearms. From here, I could see his biceps pushing against the fabric. Fuck, he looked hot.
Before I could get caught drooling, I forced my eyes away, only then noticing Evelyn at his side, arm hooked through his. As Josie and Wyatt came up to hug Evelyn, I stood a little straighter, waiting for Landon’s eyes to meet mine. The last fewweeks, every time we’d been around friends, he would look at me and give a little wink before he looked away. It was our thing.
I watched with bated breath as Landon scanned the crowd. It was like he was trying to find me. I stilled as his eyes finally met mine. I didn’t know what I was expecting but it definitely didn’t include him looking right over me as if I wasn’t there. Like I was invisible.
My throat tightened as my heart squeezed in my chest. The hurt that filled me at his lack of acknowledgement had me clenching my wine glass. I didn’t need Landon to march over here and say hello, but he could have at least acknowledged me.
Hurt and anger grew in my chest. I got the two of us were just messing around, and he didn’t want the others to find out. But this was beginning to feel like more than that, and him not noticing me hurt more than I cared to admit.
“You okay?” Max’s voice beside me pulled me from my daze. I had no right to be so upset. Landon wasn’t mine and I wasn’t his. Still, the sting lingered. What I was about to do wouldn’t make things better, and I knew that, but anger and pain were steering the wheel now.
“Perfect.” I turned my whole body to face Max. Putting on a coy smile, I looked up at him from under my lashes. “What’s it like being a hockey player?”
Moving through the crowd,I made my way back to the bar. I’d only been here for an hour and already had three glasses. I needed to dull being ignored. And the fact everyone seemed to be having a great time while I wasn’t.
Sure, I flirted with every player on the team, because why the hell not, but none of it meant anything. Maybe a few months ago, I would have loved being here, flirting with hot athletes and the possibility of a no strings attached one-night stand.
But now… now I just wanted to go home. I turned the anger I directed at Landon earlier on myself. I was annoyed that I cared so much. Him ignoring me shouldn’t have hurt as bad as it did. Knowing that just pissed me off more.
