Page 13 of Fear of Love
When I started the magazine, I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t become a tyrant like a lot of the bosses I worked for. A company couldn’t grow if their employees were ready to jump ship at any moment. Sometimes, though, I could be more of a friend than a leader, but everyone here gave 100 percent andtrusted me to do the same. Something I would always be grateful for.
“Things are good. Becca is due any day now,” Susie said with an excited grin. She and her wife were trying to have a baby, and they finally got lucky last year when their final round of IVF took. Now, Susie’s wife, Becca, was waiting for their baby girl to arrive.
“You two are going to make great parents.” I sent her a smile. “Remember, you don’t need to come into the office until you’re ready. I want you to take a month or more off, no ifs, ands, or buts about it.”
The last thing I was going to do was make her work with a newborn. There were a few copyeditors and myself that could take over if need be. Susie opened her mouth to argue, but I quickly shot her a look. I wasn’t going to back down on that. She deserved time off to be with her family.
“We’re going to need tons of pictures,” Josie added
“I’ve already cleared my camera roll.” Susie didn’t even hesitate, earning a laugh from us all.
“How about you, Nick? Have a fun weekend?” I turned to my art director. Nick was the sole reasonFusion Weeklylooked as beautiful as it did. He came up with the front cover design, the layout of the magazine, and kept track of what cover pictures were used in the past. Without him, the magazine would have been dreadfully boring.
“It was good. Didn’t really do much.” Nick shrugged.
“Woo, party animal,” Susie teased.
“Nothing wrong with a relaxing weekend,” Nick drawled, his light southern accent coming through. He might have moved here to Toronto fifteen years ago when he was seventeen, but his southern accent still seeped out.
“Wait, didn’t you have a date Friday?” Josie looked at Nick with a raised eyebrow.
“A date?” Susie gasped, turning to Nick with wide eyes filled with mock betrayal. “You didn’t tell me that.” Reaching across the table, she slapped his arm.
“Ow!” Nick pulled his arm closer to his body.
“I didn’t hit you that hard, you baby.” Susie rolled her eyes. “Now, tell us about this date.” She and Josie leaned forward, eager to hear the tea. Nick glanced at me, but I just shrugged, a smile playing at my lips as I waited to hear as well.
“He was nice.” The tips of his ears went pink. “We went to this little hole-in-the-wall jazz bar,” he went on to say.
As Nick talked about his date, Josie and Susie asking questions as he did, a small part of me felt left out. Not because of his date—no, dating seemed like the worst thing on the planet these days. It was more about missing out on making friends at the office. Sure, I was friendly with everyone here, but there was still this underlying notion that I was the boss. Along with the fact that I worked more days than not.
While the staff was out getting weekly drinks together, I was holed up in my office.
I listened to Nick’s story for another few minutes before my growing list of things I needed to get done started to eat away at me. Grabbing my planner and phone, I pushed away from the table and stood. Conversation paused as all three turned to me.
“You guys continue.” I waved them off. “Let me know if you need anything. I’ll be in my office.” Giving them all a strained smile, I made my way to my office. I could feel my phone buzzing in my hand, no doubt emails piling up in my inbox like they always did.
Shutting my door behind me, I slid behind my desk, moving my mouse to turn my computer on. Clicking through my computer I inwardly groaned at the number of messages waiting for a response.
With a sigh, I got to work on replying.
“No.I told them I’m not making that deal.” I gripped my pen as I tried not to lose my shit over repeating myself for the tenth time. “They can ask all they want. The answer is still no.”
“Lydia.”My financial advisor, Larry, said through the speakerphone.
Pinching the bridge of my nose, I closed my eyes and leaned back in my chair. I had been on the phone with Larry for forty-five minutes. An hour before that, I was on a call with another magazine company that wanted to invest inFusion Weekly.
I say invest inlooseterms. What they really wanted was to come in, change the way things were done, and plaster their name on the front page. I’ve heard through the grapevine that this particular company was known for coming in and completely taking over.
“This is a great deal,” Larry said, trying to reason with me.
“For some. Not for me.”
“You realize they’re offering over four million dollars to partner with you, PLUS monthly earnings?”I could tell Larry was getting frustrated with me. We were going around and around for the last forty minutes, and each time we got to this point in the conversation, I said no.
I couldn’t help but think of Landon’s words from Sunday. It had only been two days since Mila’s, but his words were still fresh in my mind.Money hungry.If all I cared about was money like he said, I would have taken this deal immediately.
Four million dollars. That was more than anyone could ever ask for. Maybe I was an idiot for saying no, but I didn’t put myblood, sweat, and tears into making this magazine what it was just to turn around and give it away. They’d completely ruin what I’ve built, and who’s to say if they’d keep my employees around or get rid of them.
