Page 88 of The Best Worst Mistake
And, thanks to Grant’s letters, I know that he’s always been the man who, unbeknownst to me, would stay up all night just to fan a fire if he knew it’d keep me safe.
He’s always been the guy cast behind the scenes, but never stolen the show. Never allowed himself to overstep the invisible boundary following whatever ridiculous coin toss they had over me a decade ago.
I wantSilas.ThisSilas.Allof Silas.
And I don’t want whatever is in that letter to get in the way of this moment any more than it already has.
“I know you wanted a chance with me back when you flipped that coin with Grant,” I whisper. Then I press my lips against his. “And I know it was forever ago. And maybe you changed your mind about wanting me. But I want you.” I watch his eyes flicker, hoping for any fragment of an answer to flash behind them. “This might be messy. But if Nonna Lisi was right, then messy can end up being okay. It can end up being more than okay. Right?”
The green pools of his eyes dart back and forth, studying mine, making sure this is everything it should be before kissing me again. The sheer intensity of his self-control is making me lose mine all over again.
“I’ve never wanted anything more in my life,” he tells me. “But I can’t forget that—”
I interrupt him before he can finish. “Then just think of me as another girl — begging you to take her,” I whisper. I don’t want either one of us to say his name right now. Not tonight. Not when I’m feeling so desperate to be right here. Fully present, and not in the past.
I try to kiss him again, but his lips brush against mine as he answers. “You have never beenjustanother girl,” he says in a way that makes my knees go weak. “You have only ever beenthegirl. The only one I ever wanted.”
He rubs the warm pad of his thumb across my lips, and I bite down gently, catching one of his thumbs between my teeth before releasing it back to him with a smile.
“I have wanted you since the day I met you,” he says, still holding on. Then he presses his forehead against mine and kisses me softly. So gently that stars begin spinning behind myeyes. “And believe me when I say that you will never, ever bejust another girl.”
Chapter 41
Juliet
Silas swings me around by the waist and I walk backward until my spine is up against the wall behind us, the length of his body pressing me into it. His teeth drag across my bottom lip, tugging it gently, before devouring my lips all over again. I can feel him growing hard between my legs, and I widen my stance to let him push against me. I let out a groan when he grabs me tighter, leaving no space for anything to get between us.
Silas knows how to take what he wants — and what he wants right now is me.
“To the bed,” I manage to say.
“Not yet.”
He releases my waist and presses both of his palms into the wall above my head, staring down at me, intensely. His eyes darken to a shade I’ve never seen and he tips my chin up.
“I’m going to take my time with you,” he says, leaning in. “Make you forget your own name. Make you forget which continent you’re on.”
My stomach twists, hoping he’s serious. Knowing how much I want him to do exactly that.
I feel dizzy with my back against the wall, grateful I have the support to stay standing.
He tilts my chin higher and my eyes roll to the back of my head when his lips find that sensitive spot just beneath my ear. This time he doesn’t hold back. I have to fight my legs from turning into liquid as he works his way down my neck. My wrists held firmly above, totally at his mercy.
He presses his hips to mine and links both my wrists in one hand, then runs the other hand down my arm, cupping my body, as the heat from his palm sinks into my skin.
Then he steps back to yank my dress open, each button flying off the front before it slides off my shoulders and falls to the floor.
“Silas!” I exclaim, not mad but laughing.
“Promise I’ll have two more delivered first thing tomorrow,” he growls into my neck. “One to keep, and one to do the same thing with again.”
I laugh until he finds that spot under my jaw and my laughter fades into a moan.
Then he hoists me up against him and I wrap my legs around his waist while he buries his face into my chest, kissing the heaving flesh he’s just exposed above my bra, before bringing his face to mine. His eyes lose their humor when he finds the clasp halfway up my back. I feel the band tighten as he holds both sides between his fingers.
I grin at him, signing the silent permission slip with a look.
“I dare you,” I tell him.
