Page 75 of Searching for Sadie
"You're going through a lot right now. You're allowed to feel however you're feeling. I'm just glad to spend time with you no matter what you’re feeling. Be as messy as you need to be."
She gave a huff of laughter as she wiped her tears away. "How are you this blue-collar sports guy, but are somehow more in touch with your emotions than half the artists I know?"
"You've met my mother. We talked about feelings in my house."
"Wow... how healthy. We all pretended not to have them in my house. Now I have no relationship with my sister because I can't articulate just how much she hurt me, and my mom is just hoping we'll all come to Christmas and pretend like nothing ever happened."
"Well, that all sounds... awful."
"Yeah, and I just can't seem to make myself pretend to be okay anymore."
"Good."
She turned to him with a questioning expression.
"I mean, it's not good that you're hurting, but it's good you aren't pretending."
She nodded and turned away. "I think they're about ready for the reveal," she said, turning the show back on.
They settled into the couch and ate pizza and enjoyed each other's company. Before long they'd been watching TV for long enough streamflix asked if they were still watching.
"I hate when they do that, let me binge my show judgement free. I mean damn."
He laughed as he slid his arm even more around her, pulling her close. "Damn," he said.
"What?" she asked, turning her head.
Oops, he had not intended that to be out loud. So, he did all he knew how to do, he kissed her again.
"Do you want to stay the night? I have to be at Liam's in the morning to install some electric to a garden shed, so I should probably get to bed?—"
"I appreciate it, I do, but I'm just not up to sex tonight."
"Hey," he said again, pushing that lock of hair behind her ear that kept falling across her face. "We don't have to do anything you don't want to do. I just want to hold you, but if you want to go home that's of course fine too."
"How on earth did I get the best neighbor on the planet?" she asked before giving him a sweet kiss.
"I think a little beyond the grave matching making may have been at play. Your aunt was always telling me about her amazingly talented niece."
"She was not."
"Oh no, Songbird. She was. All the time."
A genuine smile spread across her face. He wasn't sure he'd seen a smile that big since they were on the Ferris wheel. "Did she really?"
"She showed me all kinds of pictures and told me all about her niece who was a songwriter in Nashville. She always said we'd make a cute couple... and well, I have to agree with her."
"Even though I'm a mess crying one minute laughing the next?"
"Even then," he said, kissing her forehead.
"What do I say when they ask if I'm seeing anyone?" she asked with her eyes scrunched shut.
"What do you mean?"
She opened her eyes, but they were still filled with trepidation. "It's just I'm going to have to go film the reunion show in two weeks. I know they are going to ask me if I'm seeing anyone and I'm just not sure what to tell them."
"Well, you can tell them whatever you want. We are seeing each other, but if you would rather not disclose that it doesn't bother me."
