Page 22 of Searching for Sadie

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"Is everything okay?" he asked.

The genuine concern in his eyes almost brought tears to her eyes. This was not how she was expecting tonight to end. Here she was standing on her porch holding a giant stuffed cat that an incredible man had just won for her, and she rejected him even though a very large part of her wanted to kiss him.

No, everything was not okay.

"I'm okay. It's just that I am getting out of an awful situation. I'm just not sure if I'm ready for anything yet."

"Okay, friends?" he asked with a small smile that coiled deep in Sadie's belly.

"Friends... and neighbors."

He dipped his head while the warmth in his eyes never left. "I'll see ya later, neighbor."

He pinned her in place with a gaze. Damn it. All she wanted to do was kiss him... but it wasn't right. Not yet. She needed to navigate the mess she'd left behind in Nashville before she was able to move on with someone, especially someone who seemedas amazing as Lucas. He didn't deserve to be brought into the mess her life was.

Her gaze followed him as he walked down her front steps and headed over to his porch. Even as he climbed his own steps, she couldn't seem to take her eyes off him. Everything had just been so perfect.

When he reached his own front door he turned it her, "Good night, neighbor."

"Good night," she said as they both opened their front door.

Once she was in, she closed the door behind her and then melted against it. Wow. Lucas was something else altogether. Her head fell to the side only to get a nose full of his fragrance because... she was still wearing his flannel. Burying her nose in the collar she took a deep breath.

Her phone buzzed in her pocket. As she pulled it out, she saw it was a text from Zara, one of the producers from the show, reminding her to amp up her social media since the show would air in one month.

Her head dropped back against the door with a thud.

This is exactly why she couldn't be with someone as wonderful as Lucas right now, she would not drag him into this mess.

And of course, they wanted her to amp up her social media. She'd privated all her accounts. Sadly, she would have to go public with them again soon because it was in her contract for the show.

She sank down the door until she was sitting cross legged on the plush pink carpet. Just as she was about to sink into a funk, her giant orange cat in her life came over to inspect the fake giant orange cat she'd just brought home.

After smelling it, George gave a sneeze that shook his whole head before climbing into her lap. She picked him up and snuggled him to her face as his purrs started. At least she hadthis fluffy monster to help her get through everything that was about to start coming her way.

Her phone buzzed next to her again. This time it was her sister.

Tricia - Can we talk?

That was it.

She'd just had the most magical night. Her handsome next-door neighbor had just won her a giant stuffed animal, introduced her to all his friends, and made her feel so special. Yet here she was again, feeling just as alone and awful as she was when she first moved here.

Tonight was nice, but it was all pretend. Even if it did feel more real than anything in her life had for the last year. After a deep breath she stood up and carried herself up to her little bedroom. She decided maybe a long hot shower would help her to calm down.

After a shower, she couldn’t seem to help herself. She put on her sleep shorts, a tank top, and then slipped Lucas's flannel back on. It seemed to comfort her. Like maybe, in some alternate universe, she could have just kissed him on the porch and enjoyed their night together and not have producers texting her afterward telling her how to live, or her sister texting to say who knows what.

She walked over and put on a Dolly record before retreating to her window seat to look out into the night sky.

Her phone buzzed again.

Tricia - How long are you going to do this?

George came in and hopped up on her lap and butted her face. She would have to deal with all this soon, but instead she just sat in this window seat, listening to Dolly, hiding from all her troubles.

It was fine.

Yet, something about the light shining in the window in the house across the driveway told her there was hope. If she could manage to get through this.