Page 35 of Don't Call Me Daddy
The crowd erupts in applause as Mary scoops him up and cuddles him to her chest. His little face wears a scowl that matches Leo’s, but it’s easy to see how happy he really is when he gently blinks up at her.
“Mom’s the only person he likes; it’s the only reason he tolerates all this shit,” Leo whispers in my ear, sending a prickle of goose bumps over my skin.
He hasn’t left my side the entire night. I’m not sure if it’s because he’s afraid of what I might say if he’s not there to intervene or if it’s because he knows I don’t know anyone. His manners are nearly impeccable, so it’s probably a little of both.
I could get used to the feeling of him standing over me like this, like my own personal guard dog on constant alert. Even though we’re just at his family’s house, he makes me feel safe.
The lights slowly get brighter, indicating the end of the show, and Roman calls Leo over to help him untangle one of his brothers from the string lights.
“I’ll be right back,” Leo says, and I wave him off.
“Go. I’m fine. Best behavior, remember?” I make my way back to the kitchen to see if I can help clean up when I bump into Frank.
“Well, what did you think of the Siegfried and Roy performance?”
“I thought it was hysterical. The perfect main act for a cat’s twenty-first birthday. All of this is incredible.”
“Mary does love her themed parties,” he says with a laugh. “Listen, I’ve been meaning to talk to you about something.” He looks around to make sure we’re alone.
“Yeah, what’s up?”
His smile falls, and there’s a sad look in his eyes. “I’m just worried about Leo.” He looks down and shakes his head likehe’s trying to keep his emotions at bay. “He’s always taken the burden of what we do so seriously, and I … I hate that I’ve put that on him. I’ve known he was stressed out for a long time, and I didn’t say anything.” He looks up to meet my eyes. “Would you please take care of him, make sure he isn’t pushing himself too much?”
“Oh, of course I will,” I assure him.
“It’s just … I’ve never seen him look so happy. When he looks at you, I can see this relief on his face. I don’t want that to go away. It killed me to not give him that promotion, but I couldn’t give my oldest son a death sentence. Can you please talk some sense into him? Make him take a day off every now and then? I’m afraid of what could happen if he doesn’t figure out how to stop pushing himself so hard.”
“Don’t you worry, Frank. You have my word.”
“Thank you, Ivy. I knew I could count on you.”
CHAPTER SEVEN
Leo
Last night was torture in more ways than one. Everyone was so excited for me. Several people I’d barely spoken to even pulled me aside to congratulate me for finally putting myself out there. They told me they’d been worried about me and my one-track mind toward my career ever since Heidi—the only girlfriend I’d ever had—and I’d split over ten years ago. They’d wondered if I’d ever get over her enough to move on.
Jesus. I hadn’t realized anyone still remembered that—much less ten years later—but I shouldn’t have been surprised. Everyone in this town remembers everything.
The last thing I want is for people to feel sorry for me. Of course I’ve moved on. And as much as I wish I could erase it from everyone’s memory as well as my own, that experience is what made me into the high-performer man that I am today.
Sure, it felt like a nightmare at the time, but I was barely twenty-five—my frontal lobe wasn’t even completely developed. I was operating under the delusion that someone like me could have it all. No one gets to have it all, especially not a man withmy tastes. It’s not fair to anyone. That’s why I can’t go there again—there’s too much at stake.
Everything changed that day she ended it … and the timing couldn’t have been worse. Her parting words still haunt me.
“Of course I cheated, Leo. I had to get attention from somewhere, and you were certainly never around. Did you really expect me to sit around all day and wait on you? You’re such a perv. I never wanted to play into your disgusting fantasies. It made me sick every time I had to call you Daddy …”
The memory slaps me across the face, and I scrub my hand over my jaw as if I can wipe the sting away. She didn’t even wait for me to fully put my coat down before she unleashed those words, piling shame on top of the hate I’d already felt for myself.
It was the worst day of my life. I was so broken. I didn’t feel the impact of those words at first, but years later, anytime I started to feel lonely or wonder if there was a way I could have both, they’d come flying back to snap me back into reality.
Honestly, I should thank her. If she hadn’t destroyed me that day, then it would’ve been me ending things and pushing her away, blaming her for distracting me. At least I don’t have to carry the guilt of that on top of everything else. It’s a small consolation, but a man can only hold space for so much regret without it tearing him up inside.
I was able to channel all my pain and regret into a bigger purpose—committing myself to not only striving for excellence and growth for my family’s company, but also to keeping people safe. It’s all I have now, and I’m thankful for the reminders, no matter how painful they might be.
Which is why this thing between Ivy and me can’t go any further. I’ve seen what happens on the other side of this, and it ends witheveryonegetting hurt.
It’s already enough that my family’s already so attached to her. My too-young-for-me fiancée, who is quite possibly thebiggest handful I’ve ever met and on paper is the last person I’d choose to ask for help. And yet she was incredible last night—despite going overboard with some of the details of our relationship and how we’d met. She was charming and fun—all the things I am not—and I could see they all believed it.
