Page 72 of Unexpected Love
The hospital sits on a large tract of land. The grounds are nicely landscaped, with floweringtrees and a small pond that sits in view just beyond the wall of windows in the cafeteria.
Needing a moment to gather myself, and to let Cal have a few moments with his partners, I take a seat and text an update in the family group message. They’re all very concerned about their new bestie. I smother an eye roll as my brothers make plans to come by later.
It should feel good the way they’ve folded him into our family dynamic. They never bothered to include my ex, but I guess it’s because they actually like Cal. I’m not sure if it’s a good thing or not. What if things don’t work out and they pick him over me?
Then I’d be stuck living next to him and having to see him all of the time because my brothers have adopted him as one of theirs.
Having a real, lasting relationship with Cal could cause all kinds of problems if it went south.
But despite those misgivings, I can’t see it any other way.
I recall the last hour of pure terror that something really bad had happened to him, and I know it’s too late to turn back. I’m growing more and more fond of the idea of the three of us with every minute that passes.
Being with Cal comes with some built-in stress. First there’s Charlie. And his job, and now the stark reality that it’s dangerous. What happens if he gets hurt or even killed in the line of duty? What happens then? To me? To Charlie?
I push the thoughts away and throw away the remaining half cup of coffee. I’ve been here too long navel-gazing, if the tepid temperature is anything to go by.
Try as I might to ignore them, my concerns roll aroundin my head as I make my way back through the emergency department.
Cal’s door is ajar, so I push through and catch him alone with his eyes closed. He’s so damn handsome, it steals my breath. But the strong man I know, the one who’s built my shop with his bare hands, the one who runs into burning buildings and saves people as part of his day job… to see him lying in a hospital bed looking more like a fragile boy than a hero does something to me.
All of my wishy-washy feelings fly out the window. Right now, he needs me. Even if this can’t be a long-term thing, if I can’t see myself being a mom to Charlie, if I have issues with him being ten years younger than me, he needs me. And coming from a past where I was a burden or always judged for being lacking, right now, it feels good to be needed and appreciated.
“Hey.” Cal’s soft voice draws me from my reverie. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” I lie.
I take his outstretched hand, and he pulls my fingers to his lips. “Thanks for coming down here. I’m okay, but I’m glad I’m not alone.”
There’s more he’s trying to get out. And there’s a response I need to give him, but words fail me. So we just sit, quietly holding hands.
“The last time I was in the hospital…” he starts and then clears his throat. “I realized exactly how alone I was in the world. I’d left my family behind, was in the process of transitioning between departments. When I got shot, it felt like the end.” He swallows thickly before continuing. “But I don’t think I’ve ever been as scared as this morning. All I could think of was you and Charlie.”
I blink away the wetness in my eyes. “I was prettyscared when Kate called me, but she didn’t make out like it was a life-and-death situation.”
His chin jerks down, and he studies our linked fingers. “It wasn’t. But in the moment, panic set in, and I didn’t know that.” He traces the ridge of my knuckles with his thumb. “I realized I have people who need me, who rely on me…”
My heart cracks, and I tumble headlong into what is sure to be disaster. “You have a family. You have Charlie. And me. We care about you. We need you to be safe, to come home to us every day.”
His eyes close, and a tiny smile plays about his lips. “Yeah.”
This sweet man.
How can I keep pushing him away, when all I want to do is wrap him in a giant hug? I bend over the edge of the bed to kiss him.
“We do. I’m glad you’re okay,” I mutter against his lips.
He pulls back just enough to study my eyes. I could drown in the depths of those baby blues. The fingers of his free hand trace my hairline, before sliding into my hair and pulling me in for a soul-destroying kiss.
A throat clears from the doorway, but Cal, ever the rebel, takes his sweet time ending the kiss. I stand, red-faced, as a nurse comes in and begins unhooking the IV lines and prepping Cal for release.
And while I wait with him as he dresses and makes plans for how we are marching down to the building permit office together to get things fixed for my shop, all I can think of is that I’m either making a huge mistake by getting in deeper with him, digging myself into a hole I won’t be able to claw my way out of. Or that I need to simply let go and trust he’ll catch my fall.
Chapter 30
Cal
The city building inspector’s offices are bustling with activity as we make our way to the counter.
