Page 106 of Blood & Lace
"Go get changed," I said, ushering him toward the bedroom.
Onyx didn't argue; that was how I knew something was wrong. He listened to me and went to our room. He didn't bother shutting the door as if he was expecting me to follow. He glanced over his shoulder and stared at me intently.
He needs me.
I knew it was wrong, but I loved the feeling that came over me when my husband needed me. If I wasn't careful, it would be easy to get addicted too. The distance between us was even too much for me to handle. I put the desserts down on the coffee table before following behind him. If I could stay attached to Onyx, I would.
As if on auto pilot, we both got ready for bed. I slipped on some pajama pants just as Onyx walked out of the closet looking like a wet dream. He wore a mint green silk pajama set. The top clung to his slender frame. The edge of it was decorated in soft lacy frills that rested just over his belly button. The shorts had the same frilly stuff that wrapped around his thighs. I licked my lips, demanding my body hold it together. I had his favorite blanket in hand, and the moment he got close enough, I wrapped it around him.
"I'm okay, Lucero."
I grabbed his chin and forced him to meet my gaze. "You're not, and it's okay that you're not. I'm here. Let your husband take care of you."
Onyx licked his parted lips, leaving behind a sheen of wetness. The strong taste of toothpaste greeted my senses. I leaned down and stole a kiss. The moment our lips met, it was like coming home after a hard day of breaking down corpses.Everything felt right in the world, and I pulled him closer, not wanting to part. My lungs ached with the need for air, and I held it as I stayed connected as long as I could. I didn’t even deepen the kiss; it was the simple touch that had my entire world exploding with fireworks.
I only pulled back for a second. "Please, bella."
His shoulders sagged as he fell against me. Onyx closed his eyes, his fingers curled into the waistband of my pants. The touch sent shock waves of heat down my body. "Okay."
Finally.
It was my time to show Onyx why having me as a husband was the best thing. I’d make it so he couldn’t live without me. I scooped him up and moved us to the living room. I sat him down as I gathered everything up, moving as quickly as I could. I felt his gaze, which was trained on me, tracking my every movement. The weight of his attention only made me love him even more. I burrito'd him before settling on the sofa together. "Comfortable?"
Onyx let out a chafed chuckle. "Hot, but yeah." He rested his head back on my chest as I found some camp slasher that he said he'd been wanting to watch. I already had everything on the coffee table except tea. Instead, I had a glass of red wine to pair with the desserts.
As the screams on the screen filled the room, I didn't expect Onyx to finally talk to me. He pushed away the double chocolate chip s’more cookie.
"Tonight was—” He cleared his throat and fidgeted in his spot. “What happened was—" Each time he started, he stopped.
I didn't rush him, didn't even ask him to calm down and explain things. I just waited.
"Fuck. Pourquoi est-ce si difficile ? Je veux te le dire mais je ne sais pas si je peux te faire confiance." Onyx twisted until I was met with beautiful gray eyes. "Can I trust you?"
"Yes." There was no hesitation in my voice. I wanted that more than anything in my life.
He offered his lips up to me, and I closed the distance in an instant. "I don't want to go into detail tonight, but I want to tell you.” He shook his head, his eyes downcast. “No, it’s more like I need to… I’ve never trusted anyone like this.”
The weight of his words settled in the pit of my stomach like an atomic bomb. I nodded with understanding.
So don’t fuck it up, Lucero.
The words were there even if he didn’t say them. A sour taste filled my mouth as I thought about my transgression.
I should tell him.
I was ready to confess every sin I’d ever committed, but then it would make it all about me, and I wasn’t the focus. Onyx was and always would be.
He blew out a breath, straightening his shoulders and sitting up straighter. His confidence was back and it filled me with pride. “Tonight I came face-to-face with someone from my past." He looked anywhere but at me. "I never thought I'd see him again, and to be honest, I never wanted to." His gaze was glazed over as if he was seeing something else instead of our apartment. "He's my—my… failed first kill."
There was something to this that I was clearly missing, but I focused on what I did get. "Did he hurt you?"
He shook his head. Platinum strands fell forward, obscuring his face. "Not in the way you're thinking. He never… Not to me." A choked off sound wretched from Onyx that sounded closer to a wounded animal than anything that could ever come from a human. "It would have been better if it had been me. Then maybe he could have lived a better life."
"Who?"
Onyx snapped his mouth shut as if he’d said too much already. Our eyes met, and it was like the dam broke. Tearsbroke out and spilled down his cheeks. He pulled free of the blanket to wipe at his face. "I hate crying." He angrily swiped at his face.
I pushed his hands aside, and kissed his tears away. "I know people around the world are so angry right now."
