Page 57 of As Darkness Fall
So, when Aaron got up and followed his team, I stared in shock, barely able to keep my jaw from dropping open. I hadnotforeseen that. Not at all.
“I take it you have some more reservations?” I said to the sole remaining occupant.
“You never asked me about mine,” he pointed out.
“You spoke out of turn,” I retorted.
“I’m sorry,” Vir said.
Another surprise.
“I don’t like this plan, though, Dani.” He chewed on his lower lip for a moment, a very human action. “It’s not good.”
“Of course, it’s notgood, Vir,” I said. “Don’t you think I know that already? Give me some credit. I can tell it’s a shit plan. Unfortunately, Lars is holding all the cards right now. And since I’m not about to let him keep my parents imprisoned, we have to go with the plan available to us.”
“There are a lot of ways it could go wrong. A lot of things have to go perfectly right, and I’m not just talking about our trip to the Underworld. If Lars gets a sniff of what’s going on… It’s going to be bad.”
“I know,” I said. “But, again, what else can we do but have faith? Trust in the others. It has to happen this way, Vir. I don’t like it any more than you do. I have a hard time trusting everyone involved, but I have to. Because the alternative is worse.”
Vir grimaced.
“What is it?” I pushed when he didn’t say anything. Something else was bugging him.
“Dani,” he said quietly, meeting my eyes. “I’m nervous.”
I didn’t argue with him. It was plain to see. His eyes, normally so strong and confident, were darkened, the blue shifting more toward the deeps of the ocean. I’d never seen him so rattled.
“What are you nervous about? Another emotion you’re unused to?”
Vir nodded. “Yes.”
“What is it you’re nervous about?” I asked, curious to see what was going on in his mind.
“It’s not a what,” he said slowly. “But a who. You.”
The tension in the room ratcheted up immediately. I had to work to steady my next breath, taking it in slow and easy so I didn’t inhale sharply with surprise. I needed to be careful here so I didn’t let myself succumb. It wouldn’t be easy. The Soulbond was pulsing strongly in the back of my head, urging me to go to him, succor him. Give him comfort that only I could give.
No. We’re going to keep our distance. Now is not the time for this.
“That’s your Soulbond talking,” I said, trying to casually wave it off.
“I know,” Vir said, still looking straight at me as if he could see my soul through my skin. “I’ve analyzed that much. But it’s…unusual, Dani. I don’t know how to handle it. There’s a huge part of me that wants to force you to stay behind. To go and do this myself, so that you can be here. So that you’re safe. But there’s a whole different side of me that knows having you along would be helpful.”
I fought back a smile as I listened to him logically describing a warring of the mind and the heart.
“But I know both cannot be true at the same time,” Vir said. “And it leaves me nervous. And confused.”
“Your mind is warring with your heart,” I said. “It happens a lot in humans or half-humans like shifters. We feel one thing, but our minds know that something else is the correct choice. Yet, we have a hard time convincing ourselves of it.”
“Yes!” Vir exclaimed. “Yes, that’s it precisely. But…it can’t be.”
“Why not?”
“Well, I don’thavea heart,” he said. “I’m a god. I’m not really real.”
“Are you?” I asked.
Vir blinked, his eyes going wide. “I don’t know. This is all new to me. Maybe?”
