Page 34 of The Wild Moon
Instead, I’d just run back to the only other piece of comfort I knew and hoped would be enough. Like an idiot.
“So naïve,” I whispered, disappointed in myself for falling for it all.
Outside, footsteps came down the corridor toward me. I looked up as the door opened, wondering what Carl wanted.
“You,” I said, shooting to my feet as Mr. Unknown entered the change room. “I thought you’d left.”
“I did,” he said bluntly. “Then I came in through the back.”
“Oh,” I said, tugging on my shirt, wishing desperately that I’d used the time I’d had to clean up. Even just rinsing my face, washing off some of the blood. Anything that would have made me more presentable to Mr. Unknown.
Why couldn’t I be all done up? Dressed to the max, a bit of female warpaint on my face, the whole bit? That would have been nice. He would certainly be a little more attracted to me then.
I could see it happening. Him walking through the door and taking in my appearance. He’d say nothing, but he wouldn’t have to. His hands would grab me and throw me up against the dirty shower, hiking the back of the fancy dress—because, of course, I’d be wearing a fancy dress to impress someone like him even though I hated dresses—so that he could feel the soft, smooth skin of my rear.
His touch would make me moan and thrust myself back toward him. Right then and there, he could take me if he wanted. I wouldn’t care. My screams would echo down the hallway as he showed me what arealman was like. Made me his for that moment in time.
My body was responding just to the thought of it. That’s how badly I needed some casual, rough sex. To just betakenand all but used. I could imagine his hands on my hips, pulling me back against him, and it was intoxicating. Growing heated at the idea, I almost went for it. I almost touched him.
What are you doing?
I caught myself just in time. The wolf inside me voiced her disappointment, along with the heat between my legs, which I wasn’t expecting. Since when did she want someone other than Johnathan?
Alpha.
Although my wolf wasn’t truly speaking to me, I could pick up on the concept she was saying. This man was strong enough, Alpha enough, for her to find him not just attractive but hot enough to want to go to bed with.
Can I use that? Use him as some sort of shield from Johnathan? Something to keep my wolf and I distracted from the Soulbond?
Maybe. The only problem was, I didn’t even know the guy. Yet I wanted to give him something only Johnathan had ever had? While I didn’t intend to die a born-again virgin, perhaps I should get a grip on myself. I hadn’t made a good choice with the first person I’d slept with because I hadn’t known who he truly was.
I’m not going to make that mistake again. Besides, you’re on your period, get a grip. He might not care, but we do. Standards, girl, let’s try and find some.
“About finished?” Mr. Unknown said, interrupting my little inner conversation.
“What?”
“That fight,” he said as if I hadn’t spoken. “It looked personal.”
I grunted. So ladylike. How could he possibly resist me now?
“That’s not good,” he told me.
I shrugged. What was I supposed to say to that?
“Not all of life’s problems can be solved with violence,” Mr. Unknown continued. “Sometimes they can. But often, you need another approach. You need to find that with him. To solve your problem.”
I shrugged again. Right now, despite all his hotness and ultra-sexy personality, I really didn’t want Mr. Unknown or anyone’s help. I wanted to either be fucked so hard I had bruises, which I was still trying to figure outwhy, or be left entirely alone. There was no middle ground.
“You need to find out what’s eating at you.”
“Iknowperfectly well what’s eating at me,” I snarled abruptly, not appreciating his tone.
It was Johnathan and our stupid Soulbond. It was his ability to find me wherever I was. It was his ability to ruin anything and everything in my life. It was the fact that if I didn’t give in to the Soulbond soon, it was going to destroy me.
I could feel it at all times. Pulsing away with positive thoughts about Johnathan. Trying to change my wolf’s and my feelings toward him. To suppress memories and thoughts that were negative and push a positive narrative. It was always there in the back of my mind. I had to fight it constantly.
I wastiredof fighting it already, and it had only been a few weeks. What would happen in months? Years? Would I eventually cave? Would I lose who I truly was to this insidious,evilthing inside me? Who would I become?Thatscared me.
