Page 70 of Bearing Secrets
Kirell broke first, but the instant she felt his warmth erupt inside her, Natalia’s body let go, and she shuddered violently atop him, unable to control herself as the orgasm ripped through her, stealing all response to her brain’s commands as she was overwhelmed with ecstatic pleasure.
Under her, Kirell bucked and heaved, not stopping until he was completely spent, sinking back into the couch.
She slouched atop him, still, barely responsive, and in complete and utter heaven. Why had she resisted this? It was just physical satisfaction. Nothing more.
Even as she tried to convince herself of that, Natalia knew it wasn’t so.
Not anymore.
32
“Got everything?”
“I think so.”
Natalia knew the answer. She’d had everything ready for nearly an hour now. It wasn’t like she’d brought much stuff with her, so it was easy to pack up. The truth was, she was stalling, trying to buy herself more time. But she couldn’t, not anymore. Kirell was ready to go, and unless she spoke up, told him what she wasn’t ready to acknowledge herself, then she had no other choice.
She had to leave.
Three days had passed since the ceremony confirming his position as Captain of House Ursa, and in that time, Natalia had noticed the changes. The guard were more prominently seen around the House again, more so than she’d ever noticed even in her brief time there.
Kirell had changed too. Not with her, but in respect to the other members of his House. Many of them were coming around to him now, beginning to accept his appointment. She received fewer glares when she moved about the building, though the outwardly friendly ones were still few in number. It would take more time for them to come to like her, to know her, but they weren’t going to get it.
Today, Natalia was heading back to the city. They would go and drop off her stuff at home, then proceed to the town hall so they could get married civilly. Then it was just a matter of documents to be signed and she would legally be allowed to work in the country. It had excited her to no end to be able to tell the hospital she could start work shortly.
Everything was going exactly the way Kirell had promised. Her bank account was now looking much healthier thanks to his five-figure deposit, with a bonus added that she hadn’t asked for, or expected.
Not that I’m going to give it back either. He made that choice, and it’s not like he’s hurting for money.
Despite the fact that it looked like she was going to succeed, Natalia couldn’t shake a feeling of sadness. The time she’d spent with Kirell had taken on an almost dreamlike quality to it. A brief moment in her life spent in a world completely beyond her, and one she’d never get back again. There was a lot she would miss. Including him.
“Is everything okay?” Kirell came up behind her, wrapping his arms around her cautiously.
They’d continued to sleep together, neither one able to deny the pleasure they got from such acts, but ever since she’d woken up that morning, Natalia had taken steps to try and curtail that, from changing in the washroom to mostly avoiding any physical contact with him. She needed to start cutting him off as soon as possible, to ease the transition back to her real life, in place of the fantasy she’d been living out there in the country.
“Yeah, it’s fine,” she said, slipping from his grasp politely. “It’s just going to be different. Going back to living among humans, knowing everything I know now, and having to forget that this ever happened, you know?”
Kirell smiled. “It’s not like you’re never going to see me again you know. It’s not the end-end.”
Was that sadness in his eyes? She couldn’t tell. Like her, he’d been guarded that morning as well, the pair of them keeping apart from one another.
“I know. But a couple of weekends here and there for a few months isn’t much compared to all the time we’ve spent together the past week or whatever it’s been.”
“It’s for the best,” Kirell said, though it sounded like he was trying to convince himself as much as he was her. “This is what we agreed upon. You’re too stubborn to stay here, you need to keep working among humans, so we’re living apart for a bit.”
Natalia knew all about the details, they’d worked them out. A few weekends over the next couple of months she would return to Ursidae Manor to be seen as his mate, to spend time with him, but after that, she would supposedly suffer an accident. Then she would have to start a whole new lie, one where she pretended not to remember Kirell or any of the events that had happened between them.
So many lies, not including the ones I’m telling myself.
“I know.” She was saying that a lot, but the more she said it, the less Natalia began to believe she agreed with it. “You don’t need me long-term. If I can see the changes, I’m sure you can see them even more. The guard respect you now, Kirell. They are beginning to truly see you as their Captain, and that’s only going to get better as time goes by. It worked.”
“Thanks to you,” he said softly, moving to stand closer to her. “You did a phenomenal job of acting like you were my mate.”
She looked away. “I always enjoyed acting.”
Was that what I was doing? It felt so easy.
Lifting her head, she met his gaze. Immediately she regretted doing so, noticing the different emotions swirling in the blue circles flecked with black. He might be able to curtail any physical interaction between them, but she’d learned how to see past the defenses he put in place over his face. To see the tumultuous thoughts he truly felt.
