Page 56 of Through Quick and Quinn
Good night!
11:17 p.m.
best night ever
11:17 p.m.
Best. Night. Ever.
11:17 p.m.
so far
11:18 p.m.
I like that.
I’m so happy right now. Thank you for forgiving me.
11:18 p.m.
there was nothing to forgive
thanks for not giving up on me
11:19 p.m.
Never ever never.
+ + +
Hey Geoffrey,
Aside from my times with you, this is the happiest I have ever felt. You know I’d give anything to go back to the days of our childhood together, and it’s taken me a long time to accept that I can’t. Now I know that you’d want me to be happy, and Geoffrey, Quinn makes me so happy. But it’s not like I need her to be happy. I was getting there on my own. It’s just that everything is better when I share it with her. I don’t know how else to explain it. She makes me feel free. It’s the best feeling in the world, to feel totally free. We have no secrets and we are totally ourselves around each other. And everything is so fun with her, and even when we’re not having fun, even when we’re in the middle of deep and sad conversations, it still feels right to share them with her. Whether the conversation is about you, our family’s pseudo-dissolution, Troy, or her dynamic with her mom… whatever the topic and no matter how heavy, our talks are honest and unconstrained.
Looking back, I can’t believe how long she and I went without talking. We both agree that it was kinda good, though. If nothing else, we appreciate each other more.
We’ve certainly been making up for lost time. I’ve seen Quinn daily since Boom Boom Day. It’s only been like three days, but I swear we’ve crammed a month into those three days. I’m still working plenty, and I love it when she surprises me at work pretending to need lettuce, but I also don’t intend to grab every available shift anymore. We’ve gone back to our waterfall for picnics, she’s taken me to her favorite bookstore, and I’ve taken her around on my handlebars. FaceTiming for hours is basically standard now, too.
I was telling her tonight how much I love my job and the sentiments that come with it. You know, like how it feels good to accomplish tasks and accomplish them well, to be needed and relied upon, all that stuff. She was totally fascinated the other day, too, when I told her about my latest digs on produce codes. I knew she would be. She is the most open-minded and least judgmental person I know. Well, that’s not really saying much because I only know like five people, but still.
She makes me kinda more open-minded, too. Like when she talks about all her crystals and her visualization exercises, I’ve learned to really listen. She swears that she owes her entire healing process (since Troy) to mindfulness and meditation and all that, and I have to give her credit because she really is good. I mean like, healthy good. She’s positive and always talking about how grateful she is for this and for that. Even the little stuff, like seeing a hummingbird or whatever. Quinn takes life head on and powers through hard things without ignoring them or dealing with them in unhealthy ways. More power to her. So yeah, I’m pretty open-minded about her “woo woo” stuff. It works for her. What’s to say it won’t work for me? I’m not saying I’m going to have crystals in my room or start trying to “align my chakras” or however she says it, but I can see myself doing some of it. Like meditation. I think people get weirded out by the word, “meditation,” but really, it’s just quiet time. And we can all use some of that.
As a matter of fact, I am going to try something right now. I am going to visualize you, right now, smiling down on me. Being happy for me. You’d probably be teasing, “Deck’s got a girlfriend, Deck’s got a girlfriend!” I can hear you singing it right now. Makes me smile.
She’s not my girlfriend. But holy smokes do I adore her. I do. I frickin’ adore her.
And I love you.
-Deck
Sunday, July 7, 2024
Note to self:
Oh my gosh, today was such a good day. Honestly, every day is a good day when I get to share part of it with Quick.
We rode over to the park to feed the ducks some rice and frozen peas, which they gobbled up in less time than it took for him to bike us there. I should learn how to ride a bike, too. I mean, seriously. How ridiculous is it that I don’t know how to? + + +oh, I am adding that to the list of things I want to learn. Anyway, we ended up copping a squat on the grass and playing tic-tac-toe with rocks and pieces of bark. Even doing that is super fun, so long as I’m with him. He makes me smile from the inside out.
