Page 99 of Through Quick and Quinn
Quick:
Check
New Year’s Eve 2024 was one for the books.
Quinn met my folks. My folks met her folks. Everyone was pleasant. Check.
I had two hard conversations left. And I planned to have both that very night.
Somehow, I got the words out and told Quinn about my dig on SIDS. Actually, that’s not true. She pieced together all my random sputterings and deduced it was about SIDS. I merely confirmed that it was. Hard conversation, number one. Check.
I wasn’t really surprised, but yet I was still so blown away by her reaction to my confession. She wasn’t angry in the slightest. I thanked her profusely for being so understanding, accepting, and forgiving. What really blew my mind was the fact that she had already dug on SIDS on her own. I was amazed by her courage. Truly astounding.
Once that was behind us and I was done sighing with relief, I noticed that Quinn’s face was now the one harboring worry lines. I remembered that she had something to share with me, too. Something I wouldn’t like very much. I promised her at that moment that no matter what she had to tell me, I would be just as understanding and just as forgiving as she was with me.
“I wouldn’t blame you if you weren’t, Quick. It’s pretty bad.” A single tear raced down her left cheek.
I gently wiped her tear away with my thumb. “We can deal with whatever it is, Quinn. Get it out and we’ll move on. And from now on, no more secrets. Deal?” He held out his arm for a handshake and accepted my hand as confirmation. “We got this, Quinn. Through thick and thin, remember?”
“Yes. The secrets torment us and make it worse than it needs to be, right? And I would rather you be upset with me and have to earn your forgiveness than keep lying to you.” She glanced down at her fidgeting hands. She couldn’t even look at me.
“Wait, you lied to me?” I asked. I tried to keep my voice steady, and I hoped I delivered my question without a sting. I promised to be understanding and I was determined to keep that promise.
She hesitated. “Well, yes. I have been purposely omitting information and keeping something from you. So that qualifies as lying to you. And you deserve better than that.”
There was something in the way she said it, something about the way her damp eyelashes shimmered in the light as she blinked another tear of shame down her impeccable face, something that sent a chill of electricity through my arms as I reached for her perfect hands. The moment had arrived, and I didn’t even realize it until the words came cascading out of my mouth. I didn’t stutter. I didn’t pause. I didn’t need to search for words. Without any effort, I eloquently and confidently spoke my truth.
“That is where we disagree, Quinn. I could spend my whole life being the best version of myself, and I would still never deserve you. You are the most extraordinary person in every possible way and nothing you tell me could ever change the way I feel about you. I am absolutely crazy about you, Quinn. I’ve wanted to tell you for so long but I was afraid of what would happen to our friendship. But I can’t deny it anymore. I am in love with you, Quinn.”
Hard conversation, number two. Check.
Suddenly I realized I had another goal to check off my list.
I leaned towards her and cradled her face in my hands. I took it as a good sign that she didn’t pull away from me, so I moved in closer and brought my lips near hers. We held them there, just a centimeter apart, and quietly shared our breath until I couldn’t take it for a second longer. I planted my lips on hers and kissed her so tenderly, wanting her to feel how soft and pure my love for her was. I could have stayed in that moment forever.
Kiss the girl of my dreams. Check.
I reached my hands behind her head to gently pull her closer to me, my fingers entangled with the hair at the nape of her neck. The movement must have broken the spell, though, because she immediately pulled away after I did so.
Clearly bewildered, she stammered, “Are we taking this to a new level? Because if we are, I have to say my piece first. I’m not starting this, whatever this is, with a lie.”
“Okay, Quinn. You’re right. I’m ready. Say your piece.” I tried to clear my mind from perseverating on the bliss I just experienced, but I was struggling. Bad. I was literally staring at her lips when she was talking. And even when she wasn’t.
She spoke the next words so quickly that it took me a second to process what she said. “I accidentally slipped about your name, and I kinda mentioned that your family’s been through a lot, but I don’t know what she’s figured out. I think maybe Mandy found out about your brother.” She buried her entire face in her hands and started to cry. I stared at her in utter disbelief. I didn’t know what I was expecting her to say, but it definitely wasn’t that.
A minute ticked by. And then probably another. She was still crying and apologizing into her palms, and I was still sitting there like a statue trying to catch flies. Finally, I found my voice.
“I need a minute.”
I slowly stood up from the couch, ambled to the bathroom, and closed the door behind me.
Get the wind knocked out of me. Check.
Quinn:
All Along
My eyes tracked his movement as he walked away, my vision blurred through tears. The sound of his slowly shuffling feet across the tile floor woefully crooned a hymn of defeat. His head hung low, directing his vacant eyes towards the ground and draping his shaggy hair over his face like a curtain that was sheltering him from further betrayal.
