Page 133 of Red Demon
“I’m fine,” I lied.
He stepped in and closed the door, leaning on the dresser across from me, gripping the wood tight.
“What should I do?” I whispered.
Asher shook his head. “You know your own path, Brother.”
“Taam would tell me what to do.” It was hard to speak. Blinking, I leaned my head against the headboard. “What would he say?”
Asher weighed that. He sighed, a deep sound, steady as the tide. “The soul has a path it must follow, and it will languish if it loses its way.”
I rubbed my hand through my hair, the weight of the decision pressing heavy.
“Do you mind if I borrow Istaran again?”
“Borrow?” He swallowed, removing the blade from his back.
“Galen was your father first. Your blood, not mine.” I choked on the words, unable to hide from them. “Everyone else seems to know the difference.”
Asher paused a minute, giving me a moment to get a hold of myself. He pulled me into a tight hug. “Brother,” he said, his voice thick with emotion. “Always.” He pulled back, his hand gripping mine above Istaran. “Take it.”
I stared at the sword, the weight of its history, letting it settle in my hand. It had never glowed for Faruhar, or Mahakal, whose code now ran through my veins. I was afraid to unsheath it with the hands that had tortured Mahakal at his death, the actions it would judge me for. So I told Ash about directed microsomething, the words tumbling out in a torrent.
When I finished, Asher pulled my forehead to his, his grip unyielding. “Nothing will ever change what you mean to me,” he said, voice fierce.
I took in a long breath, borrowing his strength before he clapped my shoulder and pulled back.
I couldn’t delay this forever. My hands trembled on Istaran’s familiar hilt, pulling it a few centimeters from its sheath. A faint blue light emanated from the engraving etched along the blade.
“It’s … not as bright,” I said, my voice barely above a whisper.
Asher’s face softened. “You’ll do better. It trusts you; so do I. But you need to get Istaran out of here. You can guess what Soren already asked me to do with it. They’re going after Faruhar tomorrow.”
I pushed the pain away, all of it, as the path cleared. I grabbed my bag from under the bed, shoving Faruhar’s pack inside mine.
“Don’t wait for me for the wedding. I’m sorry. I don’t know how long this will take.” I took a deep breath. “Where are you headed next?”
“Nunbiren. We want to say goodbye,” he said, his lip twitching up. “And I’ll dig up my century robe from the training clearing. Mira is happy you saved that.”
I nodded, unable to smile back.
He frowned at that, drummed his hands on the dresser. “Mira wiped out all the records on the network about us she could find. No one will recognize our code if we’re scanned somewhere,” he said, a playful glint in his eyes. “Istaran will let you know when I’ve secured your couch.”
I let out a huff of air.
For a moment, I thought about telling Ash just how stupid I was, to tell him about a life I dreamed up a few days ago. Faruhar, Asher and I would train in our clearing each morning, and we’d huddle together for dinner in the kitchen above the forge. We’d need to expand a bit, maybe build out that house next door that Galen had already chosen. Far would forage while we rebuilt the town, and Mira would make money selling unlicensed mods, and be smart enough to figure something else out if she got caught. I’d rebuild brick by brick in the soil where the ancestors knew my name, and Faruhar would stand with me for each step, healing a little each day until she never forgot anything again. Ash would play his mandolin over dinner for all of us, until sooner than was sensible, Mira would tell me I had a niece or nephew on the way.
I was a stupid, stupid man.
Looking into Asher’s eyes, brimming with concern, I knew I didn’t need to say anything. He knew me. He knew it all. I settled the bag on my back.
“Ash, I need you to promise me something,” I said, low and serious. “If I ever…” I pulled out Istaran again, its glow reassuring. “You saved me a long time ago. Keep saving me. I—don’t let me become a demon.”
“Always.” The weight of his gaze settled on me, unwavering. “My heart and mind are with you.”
Chapter 54
Unshaken
