Page 48 of Don't Break My Heart
With shaky hands I pull my dress off the hanger and shimmy into it, zipping up the exposed metal zipper. Then I find a cute pair of blacksuede ankle boots and slip them on. I return to the bathroom mirror, the reflection staring back at me not one I even recognize. Who the fuck is this girl? Not Sloane Stryker, or Ava Moretti. I have no idea who I am. So much has happened in the last few months. Finding out who my real parents are, finding out I’m not a Stryker by blood. It’s shaken me to the core and made me feel uncomfortable in my own skin in a way I never thought I could. My brothers tell me to be strong like them, that I’m still a Stryker in their eyes, but how can that be true.
As I stare back at my reflection, I paint on my make-up to perfection and fix my long blonde hair in a neat high ponytail. So at least on the outside I look like the girl they all think I am. I stare myself in the eyes.You can do this, Sloane,I tell myself, trying to find the confidence I’m not feeling today.
I march out into the main part of my apartment to find Cruz in the kitchen drinking a mug of coffee. “Do you know where my keys are?” I throw over my shoulder as I stride past, my heeled boots clicking on the wooden planks.
“That was cold, Sis. Even for you.”
I throw a look over my shoulder. Is he kidding me? “You were listening?” I snap back.
He raises a brow as he polishes off the rest of his coffee and places his mug in the sink. “It was hard to miss with all the yelling and cursing.”
“Fuck, Cruz,” I whisper, knowing how bad it was, my stomach still churning uncomfortably. “What the hell else was I supposed to do? I can’t live like this anymore.”
He collects a takeout mug and hands it to me. I glance down at it, surprised he made me a coffee. “Maybe you need to put yourself in his shoes.”
I huff out a laugh, knowing right now I’m starting to look like a crazy person, but I don’t care. “Where are my keys?” I ask again, notwanting to get into it with him. He helped me out last night, and I appreciate it, but I don’t need a lecture this morning. I search the hallway counter, picking up wallets and others sets of keys as I search for mine.
“I know you feel like you don’t have any control of your own life. But for him, the poor dude is in love with you, and he’s scared to death that someone is going to take you away from him.”
When did my brother become a love expert? I place my coffee down on the sideboard then stalk back over to him and shove him in the chest. “What the fuck do you know about love, Cruz. Those fuckers all tricked me. More than once. You know why I’m back here? Because fucking Orlando drugged my wine so I passed out and then the fucker snuck me onto his private jet and cable-tied me to the seat so I couldn’t escape before the jet took off. They were all accomplices. They wanted me back here and pliable. I was asking too many questions, trying to fucking make a change, and they knew sending me away would silence me. Not only that, they knew they could control me. And I won’t be that girl anymore. This is my fucking life, and I’m going to do what I want with it.”
He studies me, his eyes wide, his lips forming a thin, unimpressed line, his fists balling at his sides, and I know I have said too much. Cruz is liable to cause a riot in my honor. “Okay, that is pretty fucked up.”
“You think? Maybe they should see life from my perspective for once. Not one of them would survive it. The loss of control, the lies, and fucking secrets. And I won’t do it anymore either. If they can’t treat me like one of them, it’s over. I’m better off alone.” Pain radiates through my chest, raw and devastating.
“Do you really mean that? I saw the way you looked at them, the way they wanted to care for you. They moved heaven and earth to takeout their papa to protect you. This isn’t something you can just walk away from, Sloane, you know it as well as I do.”
I stare back at him, my heart racing out of my chest because I know this isn’t over. When it comes to those four, it probably will never be. They have dug their claws so far under my skin I’m sure I’ll have to have them surgically removed. “Love is not control, Cruz.” I stalk away from him again, needing to get the hell out of here and away from this conversation. “Ahh, tell me where the fucking keys are, I need to get to work.”
“You haven’t driven a car in years.” Jagger stands in the front hall, twirling my car keys in his fingers.
I stalk to him, snatching them from his grip. “I rode a bike in Italy. I’m sure I can handle my car.” I smirk at him, smug as all hell.
“Y…You what,” he stutters out.
“I also learned how to swim and kill a man with my bare hands.” I wink at Cruz, and he smirks back at me. “I’m not the same girl who was taken, and it will do you all good to remember that.” I stride out the front door with a little smirk on my lips. That sure shut up Cruz and made me feel just a little more powerful again. Okay, so I’m not the same girl who left this place, but maybe, just maybe, that’s a good thing.
I take the elevator down to my car and press the fob. I open the door and sit in the driver’s seat, wrapping my hands around the steering wheel, inhaling the fresh leather scent. I can do this; it’s only scary because it’s been so long. I press the ignition and push in the brake, and the car springs to life. Swallowing down the lump in my throat, I glance over my shoulder to make sure it’s clear and safe for me to reverse. I place the shift stick into reverse and accelerate slowly, turning the steering wheel as I go. Surprising myself when the car cooperates and does exactly what I need it to.
Today I get back a little power. Even if my heart is so broken I don’t think I will ever recover.
Chapter 22
IpullupatThe Raven’s Nest, my heart hammering and hands shaking. I’m alive, just. I turn off my car and suck in a deep breath, trying to get myself under control before I walk into the club. So much has happened already this morning. A small part of me knows this is too much to handle in my sleep-deprived state, but I can’t hide in fear. I have to face my old life and hopefully sneak back in there almost unnoticed, everything falling back into a routine easily.
I glance in the rearview mirror when I hear another car pull into the empty lot, and I find Romeo’s matte-black Maserati GranTurismo pull in, Reef in the driver’s seat. Oh, for fuck’s sake. I didn’t even get five minutes to myself to assimilate back into my old life without one of these fuckers around.
I close my eyes and suck in a deep breath, and it’s shaky as fuck. You can do this, Sloane. Face Romeo and Reef then walk into your club like you own the place, because you do. I shove open my door and step out of the car, running my hands over the skirt of my dress to smooth out the fabric.
“What happened to your car?” comes Romeo’s voice from behind me, more playful than I expected after Onyx’s hostility toward me. Maybe they are going for a good cop, bad cop kind of routine to get me to come round.
I wince. I was really hoping no one would notice, but of course he did. I turn to face him as he steps out of his car. “Nothing a little buff won’t fix,” I snip, glancing over the damage. That damn garage wall was a little closer than I expected.
He raises a cheeky brow. “Been a while, hey?” He smirks smugly in a way that makes my hackles rise.
“I know how to drive, Romeo.”
He runs his finger along the very fresh scratch in the side of my car. “Of course you do, doll face.” He dusts off his fingers. “I thought the big dude was going to drive you in today. You know, after he gave it to you for taking off in the middle of the night and scaring us all half to fucking death this morning when we discovered you gone.”
