Page 82 of Chasing Stars
I close my eyes, stopping in my tracks, and sucking in a breath. Then I keep walking without looking in his direction.
“Jenna, please,” Miles begs. “Please talk to me.”
I stop, sighing, and turn to face him. He looks like I feel—his hair is disheveled, his clothes are rumpled, and the look of torment on his face matches the storm inside my chest. The sight of him almost has me running into his arms. He’s holding the most beautiful bouquet of pink roses, white lilies, and eucalyptus. A small card sticks out of the top of the bouquet
“Please,” he says again. “Jenna, I’m so sorry I broke your trust.”
It takes me a moment to find my voice and when I do, it comes out wobbly. “I know you’re sorry, Miles,” I murmur. “But?—”
“No.” He takes a step closer to me. “No, don’t say but.” He shakes his head, as if to clear it.
Against my better judgment, I step toward him. He thrusts the bouquet at me, and I take it. I close my eyes, inhaling the beautiful, comforting scent, then slowly meet Miles's gaze.
“These are lovely, thank you,” I start slowly.
“Jenna, I love you,” Miles pleads.
I shake my head, holding up my hand. “Miles, you don’t. You might have thought you did, but maybe we rushed into things. I’m just so sad—about you, about my dad. I need some space.” My eyes well with tears, but I rapidly blink them away. I can’t let him see me cry.
“No. We didn’t rush into this.Thisfound us.” Miles moves so he’s standing in front of me. He catches my elbow, and Iforce myself to ignore the sizzle bolting up my arm at his touch. Even when I’m mad at him, the chemistry between us is electric. Another few minutes here, watching him plead for forgiveness, and I’ll be putty in his hands.
I close my eyes, then open them again, attempting to control my emotions. “I accept your apology,” I say calmly.
Relief floods his face, and he runs his hand up and down my bicep, sending a shiver throughout my body.
I take a step back, being this close to him, when emotions are this high, is dangerous to my resolve. I shake my head, and his face falls.
“I just need some time to figure this out. I haven’t dated anyone seriously in years and…all of this feels really heavy.” I look down, pushing my lips together to fight off the threatening tears.
“Jenna,” Miles rasps. “I love you so much. What can I do?”
I slowly bring my eyes up to his and shrug. “I don’t know, Miles. Just let me figure this out on my own,” I say sadly, averting my eyes to the pavement between us.
“Let me fix it, please.” He steps closer, forcing me to back up.
“I can’t, Miles. I’m so sorry.” I turn and race up the stairs behind me, leaving him staring after me.
42
MILES
Aweek has passed since Jenna ripped out my heart and stomped on it. After I gave her the flowers, my world came crashing down. I never knew what I was missing until I met Jenna, and now I have to go back to a life without her. The only problem is, I can’t. I can’t get out of bed. I haven’t gone surfing or talked to my friends. I’m a mess, and I don’t see the point in picking myself up.
On Monday morning, the week before Thanksgiving, there is a loud knocking on my front door. I’m sprawled on my couch, alternating between sleeping and staring at the ceiling. Pete barks, and the knocking gets progressively louder.
“Miles, let us in.” My brother’s voice bellows from the other side.
“Go away,” I moan. “I’m fine.”
“You’re not fine!” My mother’s shrill voice through the door startles me.
I scowl and roll off the couch. “You brought Mom?” I growl, stalking to the door.
I swing it open. Nate and Mom stand on the other side, worried expressions on their faces. Rightfully so, I guess,considering I haven’t been to work all week. I just don’t see the point anymore.
“Someone had to get you up and out of the house,” Nate mutters, shaking his head. “Miles, buddy, you gotta do something.”
“I’m fine,” I assure them, turning and walking back inside.
