Page 55 of Chasing Stars
I take her hand, pulling her into me and wrapping my arms around her. “It would be my pleasure,” I whisper in her ear. “On one condition.”
Jenna pulls back and looks up at me, her eyes questioning. “What’s that?”
“Can we go surfing after this?”
Jenna lets out a peal of laughter. “Absolutely.”
27
JENNA
It’s nearly four o’clock by the time the guys finish tarping the roof, and Miles and I set off to the beach. The rain passed, and the waves are much tamer, but the air is significantly cooler. That summer reboot we’ve been experiencing is quickly becoming a distant memory.Soon, there will be no more surfing. For me anyway. I’m sure Miles will still be dragging himself out here mid-winter.You might not be here to see it,I remind myself.I really need to make a plan.
Last night with Miles was downright magical. It was the kind of night that doesn’t happen to me. The kind of night where the man of your dreams makes you feel safe, protected, cherished…seen. If this is just a fling for him, then Miles is a damn good actor, because I have felt nothing but cared for by him. Now, I need to figure out what all this means for me.
“You ready?” Miles asks, grinning with excitement as he yanks the longboard off his roof rack. He passes it to me before getting his shortboard down.
I suck in a breath. “I’m anticipating the ice-cold water,” I admit.
Miles laughs. “Don’t worry. Cold water is great for you.”
“I’ll be the judge of that, thank you,” I mutter, following him down the beach.
We crouch down and Miles passes me a block of wax. We get to work, waxing our boards. I’m silently worrying about how quickly daylight is disappearing, but I know Miles won’t let anything happen to me. I want to experience this with him.
“Let’s do it,” Miles says, after surveying the layer of wax on my board. “You’re getting good at that.”
The waves are baby, beginner waves like the ones I learned on, so paddling out is easy. The icy water stings as my hands slice through it, but I quickly warm up. Once we’re out past the break, we turn our boards toward the shore. “Want to just sit for a bit?” Miles asks, looking up at the sky. “The sunset is amazing.”
He seems pensive tonight…quiet—it’s unnerving. We decided that I’m staying with him until Danny gets the roof fixed, but I’m hoping he doesn’t have any regrets about that. I haven’t yet let myself think about how I’m going to pay for any of this, but tapping into my 401(k) looks necessary. Today though, I promised myself I would relax. I’ll enjoy this time out here with Miles, try to see what he sees.
“The golden hour is my favorite.” My eyes catch on the soft golden glow on the water’s surface. The only sounds are the soft splashes from our feet dangling off our boards and the waves crashing against the shore.
“It’s a close second for me,” Miles says, glancing sideways with a wistful smile. Our boards are close enough together that I could reach for him. I let my fingers dangle on the surface instead. He reaches through the water and grips my hand. “I like the stars the best.”
“I can see why,” I say, looking up at the sky. The first twinkles of starlight are starting to show through the dusk sky.
Miles is quiet for a minute, and I debate whether to ask him what’s on his mind. He has been very affectionate, but I cantell that he’s lost in thought, too. He seems to be chewing on something, yet at the same time, he can’t stop touching me.
I shiver as he lifts my hand to his mouth and kisses it. “Are you cold?” he asks gently.
“A little. I’ll be okay,” I tell him. “Maybe I need to invest in a warmer wet suit if you’re going to be dragging me out here into November,” I joke.
“I like the sound of that. I’ll get you one with a hood.” Miles smiles but it doesn’t reach his eyes. He inhales deeply and says, “Jenna, can you tell me about your dad?”
This catches me off guard and my jaw falls slack. I shudder, bracing for the pain that never really goes away but that still shocks me every time. “What do you want to know?” I ask, swallowing hard.
“You said he died on this beach. Did he drown?” Miles meets my eyes, licking his lips.
I shake my head. “No. I don’t know much. We were here all day, and then we packed up to go home. I remember being tired and getting in the car while my parents packed up. My dad must’ve forgotten something because he ran back down the beach. Literally ran.” I shake my head. “I think a storm was rolling in.” I pause, glancing at Miles as a wave gently bobs us up and down again. I swallow the lump rising in my throat. “He didn’t make it back. He had a heart attack on the shore.”
“A heart attack?” Miles repeats, a shadow of disbelief flickering across his features.
I suck in a breath. “Yeah.”
“That’s not what I expected you to say,” he admits, squeezing my hand. “I’m really sorry, Jenna.” And he looks it—devastatingly so—as if, all of a sudden, he’s seeing straight through the depths of my grief, right to my soul.
I shiver again. “I could never talk to my mom about it without her getting hysterical. Eventually, I just stopped asking.” I shrug.“Maybe I’ll get the courage to ask Aunt Leona more about it.” I pull my hand away and rub my arms to generate heat.
