Page 44 of The Space Between
I say nothing, though I want to scream at her not to.
She doesn’t push. She never does. That’s part of what makes this so dangerous.
She grabs her clothing from the floor, walks down the stairs, and leaves. I don’t follow, and I don’t say a word.
Standing at the window, out of sight, I watch her walk back to her cabin in my old t-shirt, bare legs and morning hair and thecalmest expression I’ve ever seen on her face. I just shoved her away and she just… left.
That’s what it’s supposed to look like. If I let her in, this is what I could have.
But I still don’t let myself want it.
By midmorning,Reece is whistling on the dock like he’s trying to get under my skin.
It works.
“You want to get punched?” I mutter.
He just grins at me. “I’m happy for you.”
I shoot him a look.
“I am,” he says. “She’s good for you. And you’re not scowling like someone just spit in your beer, which is new.”
“Nothing’s changed.” I snap.
He shrugs and cheekily says, “Sure it hasn’t, Gruene. You need to keep telling yourself that. Maybe you’ll believe it.”
I walk away before I punch my best friend in the damn face.
He’s right. It has.
I don’t know what the hell to do with that.
She doesn’t comeby once it gets dark.
I don’t ask why, but I catch myself checking her porch light twice. And I listen for the sound of her footsteps.
I tell myself it’s just habit… just caution… just whatever lie I need to tell myself to keep from walking over there like some teenager who doesn’t know what to do with his hands when they’re not on her skin.
Two days pass.Then, three.
We don’t talk, but not because we’re avoiding each other. At least, I don’t think we are.
The air between us is justthicknow. Heavy with what we didn’t say. With what wedid.
That wasn’t sex, Gruene. It was more… so much more.
On day four,she knocks on my cabin door.
I’m up already, drinking coffee before the sun’s even cleared the trees, so I open the door.
She’s standing on my porch in shorts and a sports bra, barefoot, with a towel over her shoulder and a determined set to her mouth. “I’m going in.”
I set my mug down.
She jerks her chin toward the river. “The water. It’s early enough no one’s out. I want to do it. I’ll stay close.”
I stare at her slowly with my stomach knots. “You want to swim in the river?”
