Page 90 of What If I Hate You

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Anyone else notice Bear’s mood at practice this morning?

August

Yeah the man was whistling in the shower, dude. WHISTLING. When was the last time any of us has heard the Bear fucking whistle in the shower?

Me

I’m just in a good mood. Back off

Bodhi

Can we assume this has everything to do with a certain reporter named Blakely?

Griffin

Oh shit. ARE WE FINALLY GETTING THE GOSSIP DROP??

Harrison

Hold up—he was whistling?

August

That’s what I said!

Ledger

No doubt about it. The man got laid again. Probably more than once. And now I’m going to go sulk in the corner because Marlee has been so tired with the triplets I haven’t gotten laid in a week! A WEEK I tell you!

Harrison

Must’ve been a hell of a night, Bear. How many towels are we talking? One? Two? Or full-blown hotel housekeeping service?

Me

First of all, that’s none of your damn business. Second of all…I bought three more sheet sets for next time.

Ledger

NEXT TIME??? Bro you better be more specific before Griffin starts writing fanfic notes for Layken’s next book!

Griffin

I already started a notes app draft called "Bear and the Blushing Broadcaster"

Oliver

Wait. WAIT. New sheet sets. Bear…did you?—

August

No! Nonononono!!!! NO, YOU DID NOT!

Griffin

OMFG TEDDY BEAR, DO NOT TELL ME YOU MADE HER SQUIRT

Me