Page 61 of Viper
Would Jaylen and I still have gotten together if we had grown up together?
Something deep inside of me is saying yes.
“You’re staying at the club garage, though, right?” I confirm and he hums, agreeing before stating, “Working at the garage is completely different to calling the men in that club my brothers when they’ve all talked shit about you over the years. So much shit, Viper fucking panicked when he realized who birthed you and they have a lot to make up for.”
“I thought I was like her,” I admit, “It’s why I had cut that night, not the words she said, but the feeling I was exactly like her, and that frightened me the most. Nothing else would quiet the voices telling me I was her.”
“You are nothing like that woman!” Dad snaps, and I half smile as I look at him.
“I know that now, the therapist helped me a lot. I got everything off my chest, and I finally understood she was jealous because I had a brother's attention on me while they only give her theirs when she opens her legs. The only reason why she wanted Viper was because he was the last officer brother standing,” I admit.
Dad sighs and asks, “Then why are you wanting to give Viper full custody and not give him another chance and be the family you always wanted?”
“Because I still can’t get over the feeling that I betrayed him, that I put our daughter in danger,” I whisper and I sob, “I don’t want to do it, I don’t want her to grow up hating me because I wasn’t there like Cherri wasn’t for me and I certainly don’t want to watch Jaylen move on.”
“Then don’t, pumpkin, fight for your family like you have fought for me and your friends your whole life,” Dad whispers.
“But what if I screw her up? What if I hurt Jaylen again?” I ask with a cry, and Dad wraps his arm around my shoulders, pulling me into him as he whispers, “You won’t because you have me to pull you back, you have Viper to hold you up. You’re letting your depression make decisions, and you need to try to separate it from your future with your family. You won't always feel this way, Lake. The depression will fade, but I can promise you, your guilt will never go away if you don’t fight for your family.”
I drop my head on his shoulder and I sob, my body shaking as I allow my pain and fear to pour out of me, not knowing what to do, what to think.
So much pain is between us, so much toxicity. How can we overcome all of it without burning?
Chapter 23
Viper – Two Days Later
I breathe through my hits with quick breaths, punching the bag, one, two, one, two, not focusing on anything else, including Fury, who's apparently on ‘Viper watch,’ and he is literally watching me like a creep.
Apparently, his family vacation/honeymoon is on hold until he knows I’m not going to fall apart, his and Skylar’s words, not mine.
The club is concerned I’m going to go back on the road after I finally admitted everything that is happening with Lake, worried I won’t want to be part of a club that treated her like shit.
“My wife is mad at yours,” Fury says as I hit the bag with my right fist before kicking it, and I grunt, “She’s not my wife, yet, and Sky has no right to be mad at Lake, she hasn’t been thinking straight.”
I punch the bag again harder, trying to get my frustrations over the fact that Randy hasn’t called me yet.
I really need to book myself for a fight…
“I know, brother, I told her that, but it’s more the fact that she was getting sued, and she didn’t go to her,” he admits, and I wince before grabbing the bag, and I look at him breathing heavily.
“It doesn’t matter now, Randy confirmed before Lake ended up in the hospital. The woman pulled out of the suit and gave an emotional apology letter to her, claiming to be going through grief, and took it out on her.” I reply, and he shrugs, “She’s still pissed.”
“If it helps, I think Lake has all but forgotten about it, brother,” I chuckle, and he rolls his eyes and states, “You know full well it doesn’t.”
I sigh as I walk over to the edge of the ring before Randy’s voice rings out, “It was around that time her depression started,” and I look his way.
“What do you mean?” Fury asks.
Randy sighs as he runs his hand through his black hair and admits, “I spoke to Lake at length, and she came to a realization, her depression began around the time she lost the little girl and realized she couldn’t count on you, and her anger disappeared. She started cutting the night she found out she was pregnant.”
I flinch and look down. I remember, I didn’t answer her calls after I promised her she could always come to me.
“You didn’t know, Viper,” Fury tries to soothe, but I shake my head and mutter, “I knew the little girl died. I should have answered my phone.”
“You were angry, confused, and hurt,” Randy states, and I grunt as I jump down from the ring and walk over to my bag and grab my towel.
“Well, I guess it isn’t just my daughter with a tattoo, huh?” Randy says, and I look at him so quickly, I nearly give myself whiplash as he eyes the tattoo across my side.
