Page 38 of Viper
He’ll accuse me of trapping, of being like Cherri, I know he will. He already said he didn’t love me, that he never did, he called me a whore, so why would he believe that I never planned this, that the universe had a different plan?
I drag my hand across the carpet to wipe my face, but flinch at a sharp pain and quickly lift my hand to see a cut on my palm, a little bit of glass sticking out of it with blood, and I furrow my brows as I fall to my butt, looking at it, mesmerized.
I pull the glass out of my hand and flinch at the little pain, one of those annoying ones that you can get before I look to the floor and see a large bit of glass.
I wonder…
I pick it up without thinking before I look at my wrist and then at the glass again, all my thoughts disappearing other than the glass in my hand and as if on autopilot. I place the glass on my wrist diagonally, not wanting to kill myself, just numb the pain and slowly, I dig the glass into my skin then drag it across, blood instantly spilling. I eye it, again, mesmerized as I watch it drop down my arm when I lift my hand up for a better look.
I know this isn’t okay, I know I’m going down a dark path with this. A big part of me, the part that is succumbing to depression, doesn’t care as I make another cut.
Viper's hazel eyes come to mind, and my tears fall hard and fast, knowing he’s going to hate me even more. He will accuse me of trapping him. I make another cut, allowing the pain to numb my emotions, and I slowly close my eyes, knowing I’m not going to tell him or anyone.
It may be the biggest mistake I make, but until the baby is born, it’s probably the best thing for us all that no one finds out. I’ll see then if I can find the right family to raise it, someone who isn’t traumatized by her birth mother, someone who isn’t part of the club and in this town.
My baby will live a life full of love and without pain, without me.
Chapter 14
Viper
I slowly swirl my scotch in my glass, eyeing it while ignoring the brothers and hang-arounds partying behind me, cheering on the girls as they strip, most hoping to catch a brother's eye.
I’m at Dark Angel’s Girls for Trent, a prospect's birthday, something I didn’t want any part in. Especially while I’m trying to figure out my routes when I leave in two days, something Blade is not aware of. Babysitting drunk idiots is not on my list of things to do right now.
Dad will take over from me until I return, although he is not aware of that either.
I sigh, taking a sip of my drink, liking the burn it gives while wanting to hit Psycho for dragging me into this shit tonight. He called and demanded I help him with the party, using the factthat I’m manager as an excuse while also saving Fury’s ass from a beating for yesterday’s shit.
Fucker has been dodging me.
The hurt in Lake’s gorgeous dark green eyes still haunts me. I shouldn’t have gone off on her the way I did, lied to her about loving her. The woman is my fucking life, something I never wanted but got because of how amazing she is, and I tore her apart.
I didn’t just do it to get her to continue school, something I am extremely proud of her for doing, but I also did it to keep us apart.
“I love you…”
Her whispered words echo in my head, and I sigh again.
I’m never going to get over her, am I?
Shaking my head, I take another sip of my drink and twist on my stool, facing the mayhem the men are getting themselves into. I raise a brow seeing Skull, a brother, sucking on Bubbles’ tit while fingering her. She’s my best dancer, who looks to be having the time of her life.
“Great,” I mutter.
His wife is going to fucking kill her, and I’m going to have to find a new lead dancer that can bring in the revenue like she does, then Skull will find himself being served with divorce papers.
Some old ladies look the other way when their men cheat. Heck, they sometimes fuck around as well to take revenge, whereas others, like his wife, don’t look the other way, just like Anna, Blade’s mama, who is trying to learn to forgive Brick, and they leave.
Psycho’s mama did the same thing and left Pitbull as soon as his sister Mia moved abroad. Years later, after Pitbull realized that fucking around won’t get his wife back, she finally gavehim another chance. While they aren’t living together yet, Pitbull stays with her a lot.
“There is no fucking way you managed to get her to drop her panties for you,” I hear a guy laugh, and I roll my eyes while Bubbles screams out her orgasm and Skull grins widely, his pupils dilated.
Oh great, so it was a drunken thing.
“I swear, I’m not lying, I did her from behind at The Dive,” another gloats with urgency. I quickly finish my scotch, adamant to spend the rest of the evening in my office, especially before Skull realizes what he’s just done to his missus.
I need to get shit sorted so my dad can take over from me.
