Page 96 of The Hotel Nantucket
The hotel featured a wellness center (which, I will not lie, friends, I did not visit after my initial inspection, though other guests gushed about the gym, the sauna, and the yoga studio) and two glorious pools, one a joyous hive of activity for families and one a serene refuge for adults only.
Friends, I am officially over my word limit—but I refuse to stop, because the best is yet to come!
The hotel’s restaurant, the Blue Bar, was the brainchild of Chef Mario Subiaco (I don’t have space to list his accolades; google him). The Blue Bar offered an experience unlike any other on Nantucket; it feels like walking into a swanky A-list party you can’t believe you’ve been invited to. The cocktails were made with top-shelf liquor, the fare was fun-loving (pigs in a blanket), a little retro (church-picnic deviled eggs), and a little decadent (luscious caviar sandwiches). All meals end with a visit from the whipped cream concierge. (Vegan whipped cream available upon request.) A copper disco ball dropped at nine o’clock and the music switched to ’80s dance hits.
The best part of the Hotel Nantucket wasn’t the conviviality in the lobby or the expansive real estate of the bed or the festive atmosphere of the Blue Bar.
The best part of the Hotel Nantucket was the staff. It may have taken me fifteen years to realize this, friends, but realize it I have: Hotels aren’t about rooms. They aren’t about amenities. They’re about people—and the people who work at the Hotel Nantucket are what earned the property its fifth key.
The front-desk clerks, the bellmen, the night auditor, the housekeeping crew, and the general manager, Lizbet Keaton, were attentive. They listened. They were friendly. They were helpful. They were knowledgeable. And above all, they were kind.
Some of you might be wondering if I’m going to address the elephant in the room: Is the Hotel Nantucket, as reported by the AP,theWashington Post,andUSA Today,haunted by the ghost of Grace Hadley, a chambermaid who was killed in a fire in 1922? I don’t believe in ghosts—or I didn’t before my stay at the Hotel Nantucket. During my stay I heard tales of flickering lights, music blaring out of nowhere, the electric shades going haywire. None of those stories persuaded me. However, I did feel a watchful, even nurturing, presence throughout my stay. It’s my unshakable opinion that Grace Hadley makes most of the hotel’s guests (including yours truly) feel safe—and yes, even loved. (But, as with any strong woman, I wouldn’t want to get on the wrong side of her.)
I’m sure some of you have already predicted what I’m going to say next: This will be my finalHotel Confidentialpost. Some of you might suspect that I’m stopping because I have finally found perfection, my Shangri-La, andthere may be some truth to that. Any property I visited after such a transformative experience would no doubt be a letdown. But the bigger and more important reason I’m retiring from this particular endeavor is because I want more time to stay home and take care of my children. (Surprise! I have two children—and a dog as well!)
I’d like to thank you, friends, for accompanying me on my journeys around the world. While hotel reviewing can be lonely (traveling solo and undercover, unable to share my true identity or life’s details with anyone I met), I always felt that you, my readers, were with me. And you haven’t seen the last of Shelly Carpenter! I’m starting a new blog about finding love after a marriage falls apart. I’m calling itThe Second Story.
Stay well, friends. And do good.
—SC
Lizbet chokes up when she reads the adjectives Shelly used to describe the staff.Attentive. Friendly. Helpful. Knowledgeable. Kind.
Edie sniffles and Zeke plucks a tissue for her from the box on Lizbet’s desk. (Attentive,Lizbet thinks.And kind.)
Then she reads the section about the ghost, Grace Hadley, and while a part of Lizbet thinks,Just what we need, more guests showing up expecting a haunting,she realizes that what Shelly says is true. Grace Hadley has been looking out for them all.
Next, Lizbet reads the shocking news of Shelly’s retirement.
“Whaaaaaa?” Edie says. “Shelly Carpenter is staying home with her two children and her dog?”
“And herdog?” Zeke says.
“Lots of people have two kids and a dog,” Adam says. “The whole world has two kids and a dog.”
Then Lizbet reads about Shelly Carpenter starting a new blog.
“‘About finding love after a marriage falls apart,’” Adam reads over Lizbet’s shoulder. He honks out a laugh. “ItisKimber. Kimber is Shelly Carpenter!”
At that second, the door to Lizbet’s office opens and Richie steps in.
Edie says, “We got five keys, Richie, did you see?” Then she gasps. “Did youknow?Did you know Kimber is Shelly Carpenter?”
“I found out the night before she left,” Richie says. “Kimber didn’t want to tell me until after the review was finished. She’s a professional.” At that second, there’s a buzzing noise and Richie pulls his cell phone out of his pocket. “Hey, boo,” he says. “Yep, they figured it out. We’re all in Lizbet’s office.” He pauses. “Aw, okay, I’ll tell them. Love you.” Richie hangs up and gives them a sad smile. “She says she misses you already.”
August 28, 2022
From: Xavier Darling ([email protected])
To: Employees of the Hotel Nantucket
It was a pleasure and a privilege to meet you all in person this past week. I’m only sorry I couldn’t stay longer.
Congratulations are in order for the fifth key from Shelly Carpenter ofHotel Confidential. Hear, hear! Shelly has been a formidable critic of hotels and resort properties across the globe, and it was my not-so-secret goal to win the fifth key, but ultimately it was you, the staff, who impressed Ms. Carpenter the most. I will be including a thousand-dollar bonus in everyone’s check this week.
Unfortunately, I must follow this up with some rather somber news: I am putting the Hotel Nantucket on the market, effective tomorrow. I have already received an offer on the place from a friend and colleague who wants to use the building as a satellite office space. This means that, unless another buyer comes forward with a competitive offer, the Hotel Nantucket will no longer operate as a hotel.
I thank you all for your time, energy, expertise, and dedication this summer. Every one of you should feel free to call on me for a letter of recommendation as you move forward into your various futures.
