Page 67 of Between Now and Forever
They are my priority.
I’ll have to find a happy medium, a balance between what invigorates me but doesn’t detract from the boys. I hope to God I can find it.
I can imagine Christopher saying those words to me too.“You deserve a lover, someone to appreciate all the wild goodness you have to offer.”
I did have a wild goodness about me then. I lived my life instead of surviving it. I went after what I wanted.
How do I get back to that, get back to her?
“Gabby, I’d like to introduce you to a friend of mine. This is Heath and his friend Bryant,” Della says, snapping me out of my reverie. “Guys, this is my new neighbor, Gabby.”
Wow.
If someone asked me to select two men from this bar that Della would know, it would be these two. They’re young—midtwenties, at best. Fit as hell. Their arms stretch the fabric of their Polo shirts, and their necks are nothing short of tree trunks. And their smiles? To die for.
Della and Heath sit across from me. His bright-blue eyes are the same color as his shirt.
I look up at Bryant. “Do you wanna sit?”
“I hope we’re not interrupting anything,” he says, sitting next to me.
Charisma pours out of him as he watches me with a cocky grin. He chews gum with a deliberateness that draws attention to his mouth. I can imagine those lips doing many things to a lucky lady.
“So, Gabby,” he says, ignoring the others. “Tell me about you.”
I take a drink to wet my throat. “What do you want to know?”
“We can cut to the chase, and I can ask if you’re single.”
His smile is devilish, and I feel it in places that could get me in trouble.
I laugh.
“Why are you laughing, mama?” he asks.
My laugh grows louder. “I get that’s a slang term these days, but it’s awkward when I could almost be your mother.”
“Age is just a number.” He smirks. “And you’refine as hell.”
Oh.
He licks his lips in an overt suggestion—one I have no problem understanding. It’s the understanding part that causes my skin to feel too small for my body.
This is what I’ve been after. A fun, casual night with a guy to get me back in the saddle. And by the looks of Bryant, he’d be a whole lot of fun.
The Gabby from Boston, from before Christopher’s death, would’ve known what to say. Hell, she’d have already said it. I’d be sitting on this guy’s lap and working him up. He’d be eating out of the palm of my hand.
But now, I hesitate. A snack is sitting inches from me, and nothing comes out of my mouth. Time is ticking and he’s waiting for a response. But the more time passes, the more frantic I get.
I don’t know what to say.
Suddenly, the thought of going home with Bryant is overwhelming. It’s not what I want. Not at all.
What I want is back on Bittersweet Court, hiding secrets and pushing me away.
I look at Della across the table.What do you do when the thing that just might make you happy refuses to let you try?
“Hey, Heath,” a voice says, coming our way. An attractive man with dimples approaches our table. “How have you been?”
