Page 91 of The Arrangement
“Have I told you that dress looks stunning on you?” he asks.
“Only five times.” I laugh. “But you can tell me again. I don’t mind.”
“You are the most beautiful woman in this room, and it has nothing to do with your dress. It’s lovely, of course. But you are the star of this show.”
I shake my head adoringly at him. “I hope you like this dress. You bought it.”
He grins, sipping his drink.
The dressisbeautiful with short sleeves and a modest back slit. The sheer mesh gathers to a V-back neckline, giving it a vintage vibe. Vertical seams streamline the crepe sheath. It’s classy but comfortable. But when Nadia insisted that Ineeded it, I disagreed—especially with the price tag. Nadia, however, takes her orders from the man with the credit card, and that’s not me.
I guess she was right, after all.
“We go home tomorrow, right?” I ask, a sense of dread filling me.
Jason’s eyes narrow. “Yes.”
I nod.
“Are you okay?” he asks.
“Yeah, of course.” I slide a strand of hair behind my ear. “It’s just that this weekend has been … phenomenal, really. And I worry that returning to Nashville is opening the door for real life, I guess.”
“This is real life.”
I scrunch my nose. “But is it, though?”
He leans forward, folding his hands before him, but doesn’t say a word. There’s something about the look on his face that compels me to explain.
“You have made this weekend extraordinary in every way,” I say softly. “And not just the gifts, or the sex, or the attention you’ve given me. But I’ve just felt … alive, I guess. And I haven’t felt like this in a long time.”
“Like what?” he asks with genuine curiosity.
I shrug.Like I’ve finally managed to adult without feeling like I’m on the verge of failing.
“I feel like I’m a whole person,” I guess. “Like I can breathe without feeling strangled. I took two baths today and didn’t feel guilty about it.” I laugh. “I don’t regret any decision I’ve ever made regarding Mimi. But I do wonder late at night sometimes what my life would be like if she was healthier or if my mom was still here to help me care for her.” I sigh, letting the thoughts go. “But it doesn’t do any good to wonder, does it?”
“Can I ask why you didn’t get Mimi into an assisted living of some sort?” He holds a palm up. “I’m not saying you should have. I’m not saying that at all. It’s just an interesting choice for a twenty-five-year-old woman.”
“I don’t know. It’s what I do, I guess. It’s what my family does. It’s how we’re built. You know, when my mom got sick, Mimi and I took care of her. We washed her. Dispensed hermedicines. I made her food.” Tears fill my eyes. “The last coherent day she had, she asked me to make her hot mashed potatoes. They had to behot. She kept saying that for some reason.”
The words catch in my throat. I look away from Jason as I battle back a wave of pain that I didn’t realize was sitting so close to the surface. It’s heartbreak and desolation all wrapped up in a big mess of misery.
It’s been seven years, but some days it feels like it was only yesterday.
My husband reaches over, places his hand on mine, and rubs his thumb against the back of my hand. The simple, sweet gesture causes a single tear to slide down my cheek.
“I’m sorry,” I say, swiping it away.
“Don’t be sorry, Chloe.”
The tenderness in his voice catches me off guard.
My heart strums as I absorb the kindness in his gaze, the warmth of his hand, and the peace found in his proximity.
“Anyway,” I say, “we took care of her, and then she passed. And then Mimi and I took care of each other.” I sniffle, clearing my throat. “My mom died with dignity—at home, with her daughter and mother beside her. I’m so grateful to have had the privilege of doing that because not everyone does. I sang her favorite songs to her. I held her hand. I bathed her body before the funeral home came to get her. And, once she was gone, I realized how important that was … not just to her, but to me. To Mimi.”
“You’re an incredible human being.”
