Page 38 of This Much Is True
“Of course I have.”
My blood pressure rises as I lift from my seat. I’m not sure where I’m going or what I’m doing, but I know I can’t sit any longer. I’m too fidgety, my skin too riddled with goose bumps to act natural.
“Do you know what else I thought about?” I ask.
“What’s that?”
He watches me lean into the bend of the cabinets, resting my back against the ledge of the countertop. I should stop talking and leave this alone, but as I look into the eyes of the only man I’ve ever really loved, I can’t.
“I thought about what life might’ve been like if I hadn’t moved to Nashville,” I say softly.
“I think about that every damn day.”
He moves slowly but deliberately across the kitchen. A rush of heat cascades over my body, and I hold my breath until he stops inches before me.
Luke licks his lips. “This is why I said it would be a terrible idea for you to stay here.”
“Is this really that awful?”
“It will be when you leave.”
I take a shaky breath. “But I’m not leaving tonight.”
He holds my face in his hands and stands against me. I look up at him with anticipation and expectation, practically begging him to break the barrier between us and kiss the hell out of me.
His thumbs slide along my jaw, and the calluses scrape against my skin. A bolt of energy fires directly to the apex of my thighs, and I stand on my tiptoes, ready and willing.
I want this. I need this.I want and need him.
The only thing that makes sense in my life is Luke Marshall. I don’t understand how it came to this—how we got here—and it boggles my mind that this is even real.
But it’s real.He’s real. I’ve never been more certain about anything in my life. I don’t care about the complications, although I know there will be some. I only care about being connected to him in a way I’ve never been connected with anyone else. I’ve buried so much of my pain, hidden it from the vultures swooping through my life, for many years.
I also hid the sense of feeling complete.
I’ve hidden it all because acknowledging it only brings on the hurt.
“I want nothing more than to carry you upstairs and show you exactly how much I’ve missed you,” he says, searching my eyes.
“Please do.”
His lips twitch. “I don’t want to take advantage of you, Laina.”
“You’re not. I promise.”
He gives me a soft, crooked smile.
“Luke,please,” I say, my tone thick with desperation. “Give me tonight.”
He pulls me into his chest, pressing his lips to my forehead. His heart pounds against my palms.
“It’s been a long couple of days,” he says, pulling back. “Why don’t we take it easy tonight? Just hang out. And if you’re still into it tomorrow, I’ll assume you won’t regret it. Because I can’t be a regret. I just can’t.”
My core burns, refusing to accept his offer, but my heart is a sap.How can I be mad at the man for wanting to do right by me? It’s sweet—annoying and frustrating, but sweet all the same.
“I hate you,” I say, squeezing my thighs together in a futile attempt to quell the ache between my legs.
He laughs. “You’ve said that once to me already today.”
