Page 72 of Flaunt
Me: Because he just requested $50 from me for T-ball fees.
Moss:
Me: It’s funny now. How expensive was hockey that year you wanted to play? Mom still bitches about that.
Maddox: He just requested $100 from me for wrestling in 3rd grade.
Jess: Oops.
Paige: Sucks to be you guys. I don’t have a money app thing.
Moss: $150 for youth hockey. He can’t be serious.
I switch back to Dad.
Me: I’m not paying that. I refuse.
Dad: There’s a 30-day grace period before I start charging interest.
Me: Have you been drinking?
Dad: Rude.
Me: Where’s Mom?
Dad: Do you really want to know?
I switch chats again.
Me: I think something is wrong with Dad.
Moss: Clearly.
Jess: He has to be joking.
Maddox: He can suck it. I’m not paying this.
Me: He told me we have 30 days or he’s charging interest.
Moss: What the hell?
Me: I’m telling Mom.
Jess: That’s the most Banks thing you’ve ever said.
Me:
Gloria sits down with an oomph. “They need better hand soap in there. That smells like shit.”
I side-eye my phone but lock the screen.I can’t deal with them right now.
“So the ladies and I were talking,” she says, “and we think a picture of you, topless, with a rose between your teeth. It’s kind of cheesy, I know, but we’re old, and that’s a classic pose. It should appeal to our targeted demographic for the bachelor auction.”
“How much do you think I’m going to bring in?”
“You? With those abs? I’d say we can get a good $500 out of ya. Maybe even a grand if some of the wealthier women come.”
I narrow my eyes. “Who is my competition?”
