Page 40 of Sicken of the Calm
“Wait – the fire alarm is goingto go off if we do that here.”
“Don’t worry, I’ll just tie aplastic bag around it. Here, put some of this in a bowl, I’ll take care of thefire alarm,” he says, handing me the sage. Part of me wants to protest, but we’retoo far into the adventure to stop now. I let it go.
“Ok,” Ezra says once we geteverything prepared, standing in front of the sage bowl on the counter as heholds a matchbox. “Think positive, purifying thoughts.” He lights the match andthen uses it on the sage. It’s dry, so it catches quickly, but starts burningmore slowly than I expected. It lets off a trail of smoke, and Ezra switchesthe matchbox for the bowl, cradling it in his hands.
Slowly, he starts walking aroundthe room. There’s only a lamp lit, and his serious expression transforms himsuddenly. I watch him, the scent of sage filling the room. The tendril of smokecurls in front of his face as he stops at the collapsed shelf. His eyes areclosed, and I wonder what forces are running through him, what the source ofhis positive energy is.
Like a spirit himself, hecontinues around the apartment, spelling it clean. My chest feels a littletight at the opportunity to just watch him. His long limbs, his pale skin, thestraight nose and curved lips. He moves like a fish through water, the smokyfin propelling him forward. He’s so beautiful he makes my teeth ache.
He finishes in front of me. Hiseyes are glowing in the low light. Wordlessly, I take the bowl from him and putit in the sink, splashing it with water. It sizzles out, but the heat if it hasalready transferred to the air.
When I turn back, he’s stillstanding where I left him, amidst the pillows and the sweets. He’s watching me,and the playfulness from before has disappeared, transformed into somethingethereal by the smoky scent of sage. I follow the current of his dark lookuntil I’m standing in front of him again, and don’t wait for his move. I wantto show him something; this thing inside me.
I cup his face and kiss him slowly.A press of lips, two, before my tongue comes out to taste. His hands are on myhips as he parts his mouth and invites me in. I sigh against his mouth,sweeping against his tongue, running mine against the sharpness of his teeth.
God, I want him. Want him close,want him burned and melted into my skin, deep and sure and inextricable.
We do a one-two step dance in themiddle of the apartment. He steps back, I step forward, we turn around, pressedagainst each other, like we can’t bear to not exist in the same space.
The back of my legs hit the bed.We fall.
Ezra straddles me as we continueto kiss and kiss and kiss, heating up until we’re both breathing harshlyagainst each other. He’s grinding against me, just slightly, and my handsclutch at him, pulling him flush against me. I want to drown in the scent andthe warmth of him, want it to break pieces of me until I’m disintegrated, untilI’m nothing more than the richness of the earth and the sea and the forest air,until I’m nothing more than this.
He strips me of my shirt with arake of his nails, and then yanks his off, throwing it overboard. The feel ofskin in our next kiss makes me moan, arching up into him. Our kisses haveturned a little frantic, open-mouthed and plunging. He buries his hand in myhair, yanking back, and I make little noises for him that he swallows up in hiswolf mouth.
Ezra divests us of our jeans andunderwear next, first mine and then his, and the next press of our bodies –God. To have his hard, leaking cock against mine, to have his legs tangled withmine and his hands on me, his eyes looking at me just like that.
I’m drowning, and gladly.
A jolt goes through me as helifts off me and moves away, but it’s only to clumsily retrieve the lube. Iwatch him fumble with the content of the bedside drawer until he finds it, asmall smile on my face at the look of triumph on his. He moves over me againand catches the expression on my face. He kisses around it, framing it withpecks on the crease around my eyes, the corner of my mouth. I huff a laugh andhe swallows that down, too.
He moves down my body with histeeth and his lips. By the time he reaches my cock I’m twitching on the bed,turned to arching as he draws a ball into his mouth and sucks on it. I hear thelube uncap, cap again, and then Ezra’s wet fingers are against my entrance.
I close my eyes.
He teases me for a few moments,licking at the root of my dick as he pushes just the tip of his finger in, out,in again. Even as I choke on the frustration, my hips remain still on the bed.I’m rewarded by one of his fingers sliding in fully, and even that little bitof fullness is a relief.
It’s not long before he pushesthe second finger in. They begin thrusting but don’t stop there, scissoring andtwisting gently. This isn’t the movements he’s used in the past to get me offor tease me – this is deliberate stretching. I suddenly realize exactly wherethis is going, and a wave of desperation hits me out of the sage-smoke blue.
“Ezra,” I plead, pressing downagainst his fingers. He looks up from where he was watching his fingers fuckinto my hole and smiles a little, his other hand coming to hold my hip.
“Want more?” he says.
“Yes, yes.” I don’t have to sayanything else before he’s slipping three dexterous fingers inside me. I moan ashe begins thrusting and stretching again. I can feel the pull against my rim,feel him against my inner muscles. He brushes my prostate every once in awhile, and the anticipation is driving me crazy.
“Please, please Ezra-”
“Please what?”
“Fuck me. Fuck me, fuck me-”
“Jesus.” He removes his fingersand I clench around the emptiness, but then he’s leaning over me, his mouth onmine, swallowing any protest I could have had. The kiss is as brutal as it isgiving, and I tangle my hands in his hair.
“Ezra,” I breathe between us.
“I have a condom if you-”
“No. I want to – we got tested. Iwant to…Unless you want to-”
