Page 73 of Up In Flames
“You’re so mean,” Mom whispered. “Making him think you were going to ruin his fun.”
“I had to stay in character. Any other day, I’d have tried to help.”
Dad came into the dining room a moment later carrying a dish filled to the brim with fettuccini alfredo. He set it on the table with a shit-eating grin.
“I’ll be right back.”
I shared a look with Mom, who put her poker face back on, and waited for Dad to return. He returned with a tray loaded down with ribs and garlic bread. I don’t know who he was trying to fool, but even if I hadn’t been in on the joke, I knew that there was no way he’d have made all that.
“Wow, you really went all out. This must have cost a mint.” I started serving myself some of the pasta.
Dad puffed up his chest. “Actually, I cooked it.”
I paused in midair, tongs poised over the ribs. “Like… by yourself?”
“Yes, you… of course by myself. Did you see yourself in the kitchen helping me?”
“Well I’m sure it’s great.” I gave Dad a tight, polite smile. His lips twitched, but I kept myself from giving away the game.
“The ribs look so good.” I dropped a couple on my plate and took a slice of garlic bread to go with it.
I waited for Mom and Dad to serve themselves before I tucked in, taking a bite. Dad’s eyes were on me, watching me, waiting to see what I’d say.
“Wow. This is actually really good.” I made a show of stabbing my fork into my pile of noodles and twisting up another bite onto my fork. “Could you show me how you made the sauce for this? I can never get mine just right.”
“I—ah, well, I’m a disaster in the kitchen. You know this. I’m not even sure I know what I did.”
“We’ll have to figure it out together.” I shoveled another bite into my mouth. If I didn’t think moaning at the table would have given me away, I might have.
“You should try the ribs,” Mom prodded me. “They’re so tender.”
Setting my fork down, I grabbed a rib and took a bite. They were fall-off-the-bone tender. The meat was so juicy I moaned around a bite. “Holy shit, Dad. You’re cooking every time now. I quit. Why am I eating my food when you cook like this?”
“I’m glad you like it, son.” Dad bit into a chunk of garlic bread to hide his satisfaction.
Everyone was in a good mood. It was the perfect chance to tell them. I set my rib bone on my plate when I was done with it and after wiping my hands on a napkin, I picked up my fork and twirled it around a bite of noodles I couldn’t force myself to take.
“There’s something I need to talk to both of you about.” The serious edge to my voice had my parents exchanging worried glances. “I don’t know how to say this, so I’m just going to blurt it out and then I’ll let you guys ask questions or whatever.”
“Will?” Mom set her fork down. “Is everything okay?”
“Yeah, just…” My leg bounced up and down and I had to put my hand on my knee to force it to quit. “I should have told you a long time ago.”
Silence. This was it. The last moment I’d have with them not knowing about me.
“Will, you’re scaring us.” Dad’s voice cut through my apprehension.
“Remember when I said I met someone? Well, it’s kind of serious.”
Their faces lit up and I tried not to picture what they must be thinking. Big church wedding and grandbabies. Two pointfive kids and a white picket fence. I raised my hand to still the questions I could see they were ready to rattle off to me.
“I haven’t told you the most important thing, though. I haven’t told you…” I sucked in a deep breath and forced myself to look them in the eyes. “I’m gay. I’ve been gay my whole life. I—I’m sorry for lying to you about it, but I never knew how to tell you. And then I figured if I wasn’t with anyone, what did it matter? I never meant to lie to you, and if I didn’t love Oren so much, I might have just kept on not telling you, but I do. I love him, and I love the both of you and?—”
“William.” Dad cut in on my unhinged rambling. He reached across the table and put his hand on my hand. “Take a breath, son. Breathe in nice and deep for me. Nice and slow. Then let it out.”
When my shoulders relaxed a bit, Dad smiled at me. “Better?” he asked.
“Yeah. Thanks.”
