Page 13 of The Virgin
Spencer scrunched his face in confusion. “Relieved?”
“I thought for sure you were going to show up with Damon, declare an intervention, and shove me into therapy. Not that I haven’t been there before or won’t go again. But it’s not a therapist I need, unless he was going to offer his couch for other purposes.”
“I’m relieved that you’re relieved, if that makes sense. It’s all I’ve been able to think about, and I was half terrified of bringing it up in case you hated me for it or were embarrassed.”
Jonah’s laugh was tight and tinged with bitterness. “Don’t misunderstand, I’m absolutely mortified. But if I trust you enough to blubber all over you, drunk and sad, I can trust you enough to talk it out like adults when I’m sober.”
“I’m glad you trust me, Jonah. I know you don’t trust many people. I guess the question now is…are you willing to trust me with this?”
They lapsed into a silence while Jonah thought it over. Spencer would give anything for a glimpse into his friend’s mind. Jonah’s fingers tapped out a rhythm on the top of the table, a nervous habit of his that Spencer had noticed a long time ago.
“Did I cross a line when I admitted that I wanted to help for not entirely selfless reasons?”
Jonah was slow to meet Spencer’s gaze. He wet his lips, and Spencer saw the way he struggled to open up about this. It was written in the tension in his body and the tightness in his eyes, the set of his jaw, and the hard line of his mouth.
“No, it actually helps to think that you might get something out of it too. That maybe the reason I’m still a virgin isn’t because I’m this awful, ugly, completely unattractive person.”
“Jonah, don’t ever think that about yourself. You’re pretty fucking hot, actually.”
Even in the fading daylight, Spencer saw the way Jonah’s cheeks turned pink. It lit a fire inside him, a need to let Jonah know how desirable he was.
Spencer set his beer down on the table and scooted his chair closer to Jonah’s. He didn’t touch him, not yet, but he leaned forward. Placing his elbows on his knees, he clasped his hands in front of himself and looked Jonah right in the eyes.
“You might not believe me, because you have shitty self-esteem, but you’re wonderful and anyone would be honored to know you. The only thing I’ve been able to think about is how much I want to be the one allowed to touch you. To show you how incredible sex can be.”
Jonah’s throat bobbed as he swallowed. He seemed unable to speak, but his eyes were hooded. Spencer hoped what he planned to do next wouldn’t totally fuck everything up, but he couldn’t resist the fullness of Jonah’s mouth, the thick, pouty lower lip. He yearned to see if it was as soft as it looked.
He telegraphed his every move, giving Jonah plenty of time to say no, or move away, or stop Spencer if he wasn’t into it. But as Spencer leaned forward, reaching for Jonah, grazing his fingers across Jonah’s cheek, Jonah leaned forward too. It was just a kiss. A first of many steps, but Spencer had to know for sure that Jonah wanted this.
“Can I kiss you?”
“I’d like that.” Jonah’s answer came quickly, as if Spencer might change his mind if he had to wait even a nanosecond longer than necessary. Then the corner of his mouth quirked up. “You don’t need to worry, Spencer. I have been kissed before.”
“Yeah.” Spencer pulled Jonah closer, narrowing the gap between them to mere inches. “But not by me.”
CHAPTER 7
JONAH
It wasa million years before Spencer pulled Jonah that millimeter closer and brushed their lips together, but even if it had been a billion years, it was worth the wait. Spencer’s mouth was warm and soft and gentle, like he was. It was a damn good thing Jonah was already sitting down or he might have fallen over. As it was, he put his hands on Spencer, sliding them up his chest and shoulders until he was cupping Spencer’s stubbled, scruffy face and pulling him deeper.
Holy shit. The world tilted on its axis when Spencer’s tongue teased its way into Jonah’s pliant mouth. He was being swept up in a tidal wave of desire. Where had this fire been last night when he’d needed it? Jonah didn’t care, on second thought. All he cared about was getting closer to Spencer, who kissed him like he wanted to, like maybe this wasn’t a chore for him. Or a pity kiss.
Spencer pulled away, and Jonah tried to cling to him, to pull him back. Already he was addicted to Spencer’s mouth, to the way he consumed Jonah. His brain, which usually whirred with one fear or another, had gone blessedly silent. Spencer’s lips obliterated Jonah’s ability to overthink. But now that they weren’t kissing, Jonah’s brain was going at top speed again.
“Was it bad?” Jonah asked. Part of him was always terrified that he was bad at kissing and that was part of the reason not many people seemed to want to try and go further with him.
Spencer surprised him by drawing him closer with a gentle hand to the back of his neck. Before that moment, Jonah never realized how big Spencer’s hands were, and a thrill went up his spine at being directed so gently, but firmly, closer so Spencer could kiss him again. This time a soft peck against the corner of Jonah’s mouth. A tease.
“It was amazing,” Spencer whispered reverently. “That’s why we need to take this inside, if that’s okay with you. I don’t want to give your neighbors a show.”
Jonah’s face flamed hot with embarrassment. He’d been half ready to climb into Spencer’s lap and kiss the living daylights out of him. They should probably talk about rules or boundaries or something. They should discuss the potential repercussions of fucking around with your best friend, whom you also had to work with. But Jonah was tired of thinking about fifty different ways to screw himself over. He wanted this.
He stood and grabbed the beer bottles off the table so they wouldn’t get knocked over by the weather or an animal or something. “Let’s go inside.”
Jonah hoped his voice didn’t sound half as nervous as he suddenly was, but even if it did, he knew it would be okay. Spencer had seen him last night in all his messy glory. Nothing would ever be more humiliating than that.
Spencer followed him into the house and Jonah heard the door lock behind them. He kept his back to Spencer and set the empty bottles in the sink to be dealt with later. A presence, solid and warm, pressed up against Jonah’s back. Those huge hands settled on his waist and breath skirted over the shell of his ear, making him shiver.
