Page 6 of Spur of the Moment
He shook his head. “I need her here for training.”
I’d suggest Reed, but he was busy with horseshoeing, his schedule too full to take the time to drive up to Billings. Lennon, my oldest brother, managed the feed store, so he was out of the question, and with it being the summer, riding lessons were in full swing, making Callan too busy. Beckham wasn’t even in Bell Buckle right now - he was busy touring on the rodeo circuit. With all my brothers being busy, that left me with…
“No way.”
My dad shrugged, his usual frown still plastered on his face. “I don’t know what to tell you, Lettie. Everyone else is busy, and I’m not letting you go alone.”
“The whole reason I want away from the barn project is because of Bailey! Now you want me to go spenddayswith him up in Montana?” Not to mention being alone in the truck with him for the drive north.
“Afraid of a little one on one time, Huckleberry?” Bailey said from behind me, his voice too damn close to my ear as I felt his breath on the back of my neck.
Trying to act like he didn’t affect me was impossible. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to spend time with him. Don’t get me wrong,I enjoyed our time together - pre-college. Now I wanted to stay as far away from him as possible.
Shouldn’t he have dropped my leaving without a goodbye after five years?
“It’s either that, or the barn, Lettie. You don’t get to pick and choose what needs to get done around here,” my dad grumbled.
I gnawed on the inside of my cheek, not wanting to admit defeat on the matter. He was right. I needed to suck it up and get shit done. “Maybe I shouldn’t have come back.”
I knew it was the wrong thing to say before the words even passed my lips. Bailey tensed behind me before he turned around and walked out of the house, the door slamming behind him. My dad stared at me with concern in his eyes as he let what I said sink in.
During the time I spent in Boise, I think a big part of me knew I’d end up back in Bell Buckle. Even though my dad’s intent was always to leave the ranch to one of my brothers, my heart belonged here. I genuinely wanted to go to college, and afterward, I tried to stay in that city, but I wasn’t happy. I ignored the pull in my gut for as long as I could before I packed up and drove back to Bell Buckle. The moment I crossed the county line, it felt like I could breathe again.
College was not for me, but I made it through. After growing up on the ranch, always having new volunteers around and different horses coming through the rescue, I hated how I was suddenly stuck in a grueling routine of studying and hour-long lectures. I didn’t want to be stuck in textbooks. Instead, I wantedto feel the wind in my hair as I rode through the open fields at a full gallop.
There was nothing more grounding than being on the back of a thousand pound animal - every movement your body made, every emotion you felt, casting into them.
Red was the only horse my dad felt comfortable with me riding. He’d never bucked, kicked, or gone sour. Red took care of me, no matter how I felt that day.
I needed to go see him. But first, I needed to prove to my dad I could handle what he threw at me, no matter what it was or who it was with.
“I’ll do the barn, and the trip, but I’m buying a nail gun.”
He raised a bushy eyebrow, seemingly surprised at my change of attitude. “Should I warn Bailey?”
I rolled my eyes at his attempt at a joke. “For the barn, Dad.”
“That should work out. The rest of the wood should be delivered by the time you get back from Montana. Sounds like you’re staying for a while then?”
Was I? When I made the drive back to Bell Buckle, I didn’t have a long term plan. I just knew that I needed to be here. After Boise, I wasn’t sure if I wanted to try out another place, but I also didn’t want to subject myself to staying in my hometown just because that’s where I felt comfortable.
I lived my whole life doing things that were comfortable, thanks to my helicopter family. But was it comfort that Bell Buckle brought me, or a safety net knowing I had people Icould lean on here? A sense of home that no other place could provide?
“I haven’t thought that far ahead.”
He nodded once, picking up his newspaper to resume what he’d been doing before I stormed in here. Satisfied with the conversation, I turned to head outside to get back to work.
“Oh, and Lettie?”
Pausing with my hand on the door handle, I looked over my shoulder at my dad. “Yeah?”
Without taking his eyes off the newspaper, he said, “Be nice to the poor guy. Life didn’t pause here when you drove away.”
I looked down at my boots and the dirt clinging to the hem of my jeans. I was well aware that things kept moving when I left. I didn’t expect anyone to wait around for me in the hopes that I’d come back someday.
I had to make amends with the people I hurt. And that included Bailey.
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