Page 78 of The Enduring Universe
“Because it’s wrong,” Ahilya said. “Because it is genocide.”
“That’s why you started, yes. But that is not the only reason anymore, is it?”
He was almost upon her, though his pace was unhurried. She could see him despite the radiance coming off him, the unearthly eyes, the tattoos bursting on his skin. The silver silhouetted by black, and within it this creature wearing Iravan’s body, speaking to her in her husband’s voice. Iravan moved in a blur of speed, inches away from her, and his voice grew softer, a blade within a sheath. In the vriksh, he straightened, coming closer as she stumbled away.
“You have been thinking of an alternative to genocide from the very beginning. And now you’ve found something. You, who looked into your Etherium, and saw others in the mirror. You who have given of yourself so completely to those who are so alien from you.” Iravan studied her. “Tell me, Ahilya. Did you tell yourcouncil how youwantthe Virohi to overwrite everyone? How you want to save the cosmic creatures at the cost of humanity?”
A sharp inhale of breath echoed in her ears. “Ahilya—what the fuck—” Dhruv said, stunned. “—is—true?”
She didn’t need to reply. Iravan reached a hand and plucked the sound piece from her ear as if he had heard the whisper. It was the two of them alone again, and Ahilya had never been more terrified.
Her head spun. The idea had been in her mind ever since the beginning when she’d lamented that she had to be the one to deal with the Virohi. Then, she had been exhausted with her responsibility, resentful of the freedom of others. But ever since the first overwriting, the idea had grown into an opportunity. It had started building after what she’d done to the Ecstatics during the fight with Darsh. She had asked Dhruv about his experience of overwriting for a reason. She’d worried about it, felt sick about it. But no matter how she tried, this was the only solution she could see. None of the others suspected it, not even Eskayra—but Iravan. He’d always known her heart.
“Would it be so bad?” she replied. “Iravan, architects have always believed that consciousnesses are connected. Can you not imagine that in reality?”
He just laughed, a cruel sound. “You always did want to save everyone. I didn’t think you would go to such lengths.”
She took another step back, but her body hit a wall. She was out of moves. There was no place to run.
“Overwriting has already begun,” she returned. “I didn’t intend it when I sent the Virohi to the vriksh, but there is no reversing it. Whether we like it or not, the Virohi are here, and—”
“They have corrupted you. That was the problem all along. But now they are attempting to corrupt me, and this I cannot allow.” Iravan’s hand brushed a strand of her hair away from her face, andhis voice grew deathly quiet. “They have been scraping away at my desire to destroy them. My past lives grow confused, one instant rejoicing in their material bonds, the other instant reminding me of my purpose. The falcon is the only thing remaining steadfast. It projects what I must see, but there are so many of the Virohi and there has been only one of me.” Iravan’s silvery gaze filled her eyes. “So you tell me, Ahilya,” he murmured. “Why do I need this power from the other yakshas?”
His fingers settled on her cheeks like soft petals. She saw his purpose clearly. The falcon had always been the greatest, most aware of all the yakshas, maturing and evolving through centuries, seeking its lost half. It had hated the Virohi, the creatures who had put it through insentience and a total loss of itself. In subsuming the falcon, Iravan hadn’t simply cut it away, he had absorbed it fully, all its rage and purpose.
And now Iravan was more that creature than anything else.
And she—
She was the Virohi embodied, the one thing that stood in his way.
Tears filled Ahilya’s eyes and her hands came up to clutch Iravan’s wrists.
“Iravan,” she said. “I chose this.”
“We’ve always saved each other, haven’t we?” he whispered.
Across his mind, through the window of the Etherium, she saw images cascading. Iravan staying behind during the earthrage that had killed Oam, sacrificing his own safety for hers as they ascended to Nakshar. Ahilya flying away from the ashram to an unknown habitat and to certain death on the slimmest chance to find him. Iravan rising to fight the skyrage, then falling in the sky. Ahilya rushing through the Conclave, bleeding, attempting to save him from excision.
All of it culminating into now, where he wished to make amends to complete beings because he wished to make amends to her. His silvery eyes sparkled with terrible intention and tears. Ahilya felt the grip of his fingers tightening.
“Please,” she said. “I love you.”
“I have failed you,” he whispered back. “So deeply.”
Iravan wrapped his hands around her neck, and squeezed.
45
AHILYA
Her reality condensed to shards of horror.
Iravan’s hands pressing her throat. Pain rippling through every inch of her body as if she were being flayed. A nightmarish realization that her husband was trajecting her.
Her visions collapsed, breaking into meaninglessness. She fought for breath, and though he was not crushing her throat yet, it was only a matter of seconds. She could tell by the trembling of his fingers.
Yet the danger was not in what his body was doing. The danger was his mind, which was dismantling her piece by piece.
