Page 107 of The Enduring Universe
“The falcon and all the yakshas were released with the Virohi,” he confirmed. “For you it was an embracing. For me, negation, a release of all that I once was. In the end, it is the the same thing.”
“Nothing,” she said. “And everything.”
He only smiled at this echo of his own words. The breeze lifted the shock of silver hair from his face, and he breathed deeply, closing his eyes. Ahilya looked to the city in front of her and the jungle beyond, and her heart began to race, in recognition of the great inevitability. She couldn’t bear to see him now, in all his beautyand honesty. He had looked like this all that time ago when they’d married each other. This was the man she loved, and he was here now with her, finally.Finally.
“There is so much still to do,” she murmured. “Cohesion has fragmented though I still feel a resonance with it.” She saw him smile from the corner of her eye, and Ahilya smiled too, at her use of this word. “We are changed as a species in some profound way. I don’t know in what form, but I think all of us understand each other better. If trajection is truly gone now, then we will need another form of energy. I suppose we can build something from all this.”
She did turn to him then, and saw that he was smiling fondly. Iravan lifted her hand, his fingers still laced within hers, and kissed her softly.
Then, slowly, ever so slowly, he let go.
“Eskayra is waiting for you, I think,” he said softly.
“Yes.”
“And you want to go to her, don’t you?”
Did she? Surely, if Eskayra was alive, she would be hunting the city for her, waiting for her. Perhaps the others too—Naila and Dhruv and Chaiyya, maybe even Basav. She thought of Esk’s relief. She thought of the future they could now have. She imagined it was Esk’s hand in hers, and then she saw Iravan. The high cheekbones, the curling hair, and his eyes that still leaked with intermittent tears. Everything she had experienced, and endured, and become, all of it had occurred with this man restored to her. If there had ever been any hope for them, this is where it all started. This is where it all returned.
“What doyouwant?” she finally asked.
Iravan grinned, soft and boyish, full of dry amusement. “Me?” he said lightly. “Ever the same thing, my dear. Children, and domesticity, and a life with you. If I could, I would live forever as your husband.That is what I hoped to do with the blade of pure possibility. But I don’t think you want that, and I don’t think you should. I am not sure I should either. I have only come to an understanding of myself now. I need time to gather my pieces, examine which are from the past, which are really mine. It is something I should have done a long time ago.”
So much had changed, but in some ways he had not. This was an Iravan answer, through and through. Ahilya was grateful. It could not be any other way, but she did not want to hurt him.
“You will be all right then?” she asked.
“I will.”
“What will you do?”
Iravan lay back, his head resting on his hands as he gazed at the sunlit sky. She thought she could see the entire universe shining in his eyes, a kaleidoscope of stars.
“I think,” he said softly. “I think I will lay here a time.”
She stared at the image of this man, handsome and free for the first time ever. Her heart brimmed with so much love, that she thought she might explode. Before she could change her mind, Ahilya hurried away, descending the hill.
She was near the bottom when she heard his voice again, drifting on the breeze. A last question, one that caught her by surprise.
“Wait. I need to know. Do you regret it?”
Ahilya did not turn back, but she stopped. Images cascaded over her, of the many years, and the many seasons she and Iravan had gone through.
“Several things,” she whispered finally. “But not you. Never you.”
She heard a soft huff of laughter, part awe, part disbelief. He was there, a part of her now. Just as she was of him. Nothing would erase that.
Ahilya walked down the hill, toward her new beginning.
EPILOGUE
DHRUV
He tromped through the jungle, pushing past tall weeds irritably. Even in the worst of times, after Irshar had crash-landed, he had disdained the jungle, instead keeping to the Garden’s solar lab. To have to come to it now, when there was no need to, irked him so much that he kicked a passing shrub, only to have it entangle his foot.
Dhruv let out a part grunt, part groan, hobbling away from the foliage, brushing past a thick swarm of mite-flies. What was he doing, responding to a summons here of all places? Kiana would be wondering where he was. He was supposed to meet her to discuss the future of sungineering and the city. Life had begun again with the constant rains. Some people had ventured far beyond the city and found the ocean. Fruit trees had been discovered, and a rudimentary form of agriculture was beginning, but with the loss of trajection they relied on fire and candles to light their evenings. It was a personal insult, after everything sungineering had once achieved. He should be back in the city with Kiana and the others, trying to cobble together a technology for the future of humanity. Instead, here he was, brushing spiderwebs from his face.
He had been so surprised to receive the message, he’d sat staring at it for long minutes before beginning his trek to the jungle. He hadn’t even bothered to bring a coat, and that was unlike him.
