Page 15 of Tell Me Softly
Ellie took her hands off the wheel and clapped, and I leaned over to grab it, terrified, turning just before we veered off the road.
“We’re getting trashed!” she shouted excitedly as she started steering again.
I laughed and shook my head. She was incorrigible, but I wouldn’t have changed her for the world.
Aaron’s house was so big that our entire senior class was able to fit inside, along with some of the younger students. Plus, it had a big yard, so it wasn’t too close to any of the neighbors, and that made it perfect for a party. The music wouldn’t bother anyone, and the police would leave us in peace. I’m not exaggerating when I say there was enough beer there to stun an elephant.
Ellie and I got out of the car and walked to the front door.
Danny was standing there smoking a joint. He looked at me with an impossible-to-decipher expression, and the people around him glared at me too, as if they were accusing me of something. I had no idea how anyone would receive the news of our breakup, but there was one thing I was sure of: they would take sides. I had no idea if I’d come out winning or losing.
Ellie pulled my arm, trying to get me to ignore the hate coming off them, and we went inside to leave all that bad energy behind.
Inside, people were dancing, smoking, and making out in the corners—the usual things at a party like that. I found Kate leaning on the kitchen counter after about five minutes. Marissa was there too with her boyfriend, Aaron, and some guy I didn’t know. Kate hurried over to give us a hug.
“Girls, this is my brother, Julian,” she said, pointing to the tall, brown-haired boy standing next to her. He had the same eyes asKate and a pleasant smile. “Julian, these are my two best friends, Kamila Hamilton and Ellie Webber.”
I reached my hand out to him. Kate had told us her brother was moving in with her. I say brother––he was really her half-brother. They shared the same father, but they hadn’t been very close before. Julian was a year older, and his parents had split just after he was born. Their father remarried almost immediately, and his new wife had Kate shortly after. Kate and Julian had reconnected three years ago, and when Julian’s mother moved to Florida, he arranged to come live with Kate and her family.
Julian was going to our school because he had to repeat a grade. Kate didn’t like it, but I was happy at least to be able to get to know her brother.
Julian smiled affectionately and said, “I’ve only been here two days, but I can’t tell you how many people have talked to me about you both.”
“Don’t believe all the rumors,” I said jokingly, but there was a part of me that meant it. Kate went to pour herself a drink. I took my time examining Julian in her absence. He was handsome, but he wasn’t my type. As this occurred to me, I remembered someone who was: Thiago. But I tried to push him out of my mind.
The party was at its peak, and the music and the beer put me in a better mood. Julian and I talked, and Kate seemed happy that her brother was fitting in. I excused myself to go to the bathroom and saw Taylor, who was playing pool in one of the side rooms. I leaned against the wall, hoping he wouldn’t notice me. He was wearing a pair of ratty jeans, a Rolling Stones T-shirt, and a backward Knicks cap.
He bit his cheek as he bent over, concentrating, and shot with absolute certainty. I knew that gesture from when he was a kid. When I looked up, I noticed that more girls had come in.Normally, it was hard for the girls to get in on a game, but I must admit there was a good reason: almost all of them were terrible at pool. Soon I realized none of them were there to play anyway. They were all just devouring Taylor with their eyes.
I got it. He was handsome. More than handsome—sexy.
As if he could hear my thoughts, he looked up. He seemed surprised at first, as though he couldn’t get used to the idea that we were in the same town again. For a second, he hesitated, but then he smiled with what looked like sincerity.
“Hey, Hamilton,” he called. “Get over here and show these guys how to use a stick.” I smiled back at him––my smile sincere, the first sincere one that had crossed my face all week. It was so nice to hear kind words from my old best friend.
I remembered the many afternoons I had played pool with Taylor. He was the one who had showed me how. It had taken a long time. Back then, the cue was longer than I was tall.
Was he drinking? Would he even speak to me if he wasn’t?
Who cared? I tried to suppress my negative thoughts and walked over, pressing my way in between the three guys standing next to him. I recognized them from my math class.
“Are you sure about that, Taylor?” I asked, stopping in front of him. From his eyes, I could tell he was having fun. Something important was happening between us, even if I didn’t know what. “You know, I’m not the little girl I used to be. You might be in for a surprise.” I grabbed the cue. Around us, people were whistling, and Taylor laughed and turned to our spectators.
“Ten bucks says I can beat her with my eyes closed.” I doubt anyone wanted to see those beautiful blue eyes close, though. I looked in them and saw warmth and nostalgia. Nothing like the coldness in his brother’s emerald stare.
“I’ll raise you,” I said, enjoying myself now. “The winner gets to ask the loser for whatever they want.” That made me anxious.I knew exactly what I’d ask for if I won, and I was hoping against hope that I would.
Taylor narrowed his eyes as the people around us started making insinuations.
“Anything means anything, Taylor!” some guy yelled from behind me.
“It’s a deal,” he said, and we shook on it.
I approached the table as Taylor gathered the fifteen balls and arranged them in the triangle.
“Ladies first,” he said, motioning toward me. I rubbed the chalk hard on the tip of my cue, bent strategically across the table, and struck the cue ball with precision. The other balls shot across the table.
“Solids,” I said, and Taylor stared at the table, plotting his next move.
