Page 46 of Tell Me Softly
“Dad!” I felt panic take hold of me. Even my brother stopped playing.
“I’ve got a good lawyer,” he said, smiling at my brother and patting him on the cheek. “Everything will go back to normal, but I need time, and in the meantime, I’m going to have to cut some expenses.”
I nodded. “Is there anything we can do?” I asked.
Dad looked down and then back up at me. “I hate to ask you, honey.”
“Don’t worry, Dad. Whatever it is, I won’t mind.”
“We need to sell your car.”
The news hit me like a blow to the chest. I needed a second to absorb it. But now was no time to be selfish.
“Sure,” I said, asking myself how on earth I’d get everywhere on foot. “No worries.”
“I’m sorry, honey. You don’t know how sorry I am. But three cars is too many. I might even have to ask your mom to sell hers. I know, I know…” Dad had seen the look of shock on my face. Icouldn’t imagine how Mom, who was so concerned with appearances, would react. “We’ll wait and see. At least for now, though, I’m hoping we don’t have to take that step.”
I nodded, wanting to say something, but not knowing what.
My brother pulled Juana in tight and asked, “Are we poor?” His iguana licked him, as if wanting to add emphasis to his question.
“No, we’re not poor,” my father said, maybe a little too assertively. “We’re just going to need to take a little more care with our money from now on.”
My brother nodded, and I looked at the bruises around his eye.
“You want to tell me what happened to your face?” I asked.
He shook his head and looked at my father, who told him gently, “You’re already in hot water with your mom, buddy. Don’t let me hear about any more phone calls from school, OK?”
“We were just having fun, though! We were playing pro wrestling.”
This kid… I couldn’t help but burst out, “Aren’t there any games you can play that don’t involve you guys hitting each other?”
He shrugged and that was the end of that. In the grand scheme of things, it hadn’t been that long since I was his age, but still, I couldn’t understand him and his friends. When I was little…OK, so I did break into someone’s house when I was little to steal a bunch of candy. I guess I wasn’t that much of a saint after all.
Dad bought us each an ice cream cone, and we headed back home. Mom was still in her room when we got there.
It was nice having Dad home. Mom was right about one thing: he didn’t come around much. We needed him there more. He took my little brother up to his room, told him good night, then went back downstairs.His glass of water, I thought. Dad always forgot it. And sure enough, I heard the tap turn on in thekitchen. He stopped in the hallway, already in his pajamas, and said, “Good night, princess. And listen, everything’s going to work out. I promise.”
He came in, kissed me on the forehead, and left. I’d never seen him look so upset. Well, I had one time. But I was little then, and I didn’t understand what was happening.
I didn’t like the anxious feeling that filled my chest just then. My dad was suffering, and my mother, who should have been supporting him, was making his life hell. I realized I’d have to be strong for him, try to put a good face on for whatever was to come. I could never have imagined everything was going to collapse, bit by bit, like a line of dominoes with no one able to stop it.
And I sure as hell didn’t know the first piece had already fallen.
***
The next morning was a hard one for all of us. My parents had to tell our maid that they couldn’t use her services anymore. Prue said her goodbyes and all of us were emotional, even my mother, who stared out the window and cried. Was it because she was going to miss her or because she’d have to do the cooking now? I wasn’t sure. But it was hard to imagine her washing dishes or making any recipe besides spaghetti.
“Don’t be a bad boy, now, all right?” Prue said to my brother, who hugged her and didn’t want to let her go.
“Who’s going to make my food now?” he asked.
“Your mother, honey,” she said with a smile.
Cameron’s eyes opened in terror.
“No! You can’t go!” he shouted, almost squeezing the air out of her. I laughed, and I was happy my mother was too focused on the cigarette she was smoking to hear him.
