Page 5 of My Fault
She was thin and tall—probably close to five eight, but I wasn’t sure—well put together, I had to admit. But her face was so girlish it was impossible to have any lustful thoughts about her. Unless I’d heard wrong, she hadn’t even finished high school, but you could guess that after one glance at her shorts, her T-shirt, and her black Converse. All she needed was to pull her hair back in a ponytail to look like the typical teenager waiting impatiently for someone to open the doors of some big box store so she could buy the latest TikTok trend all the fifteen-year-olds were freaking out about. Still, I couldn’t take my eyes off her hair; its color was strange, somewhere between dirty blond and red.
“Very funny,” she said sarcastically but obviously terrified. “Get him out of here. He looks ready to kill me.” She took a step back. As she did, Thor took a step forward.
Good boy,I thought. Maybe she could use a scare, a special reception to let her know whom this house really belonged to and how unwelcome she was.
“Thor, forward,” I ordered him sternly. Noah looked back and forth from him to me and stepped farther back until she hit the wall.
Thor walked slowly toward her, growling and showing his teeth. He was scary, but I knew he wouldn’t do anything. Not unless I ordered him to.
“What are you doing?” she asked. “This isn’t funny.”
But it was.
“My dog usually gets along great with everyone. It’s weird that he’s on the verge of attacking you,” I remarked, amused as she tried to control her fear.
“Are you going to do anything?” she whined.
Do anything? How about I tell you to go back where you came from?
“You’ve been here, what? Five minutes? And you’re already bossing people around?” I said, walking over to the tap and pouring a glass of water. “Maybe I should leave you here for a while to get to know the place on your own.”
“Were you dropped on your head often as a child? Get that dog away from me!”
I turned, a little surprised at her audacity. Had she just insulted me?
I think even my dog got it because he walked closer to her. She hardly had space to move. Then, before I could stop her, Noah turned in fright and grabbed the first thing in reach on the counter, a frying pan. Before she could hit Thor, I grabbed his collar with one hand and stopped her with the other.
“What the fuck are you doing?” I shouted, grabbing the pan and putting it back on the counter. My dog was furious, and Noah shrank into my chest, stifling a scream.
I was surprised she’d turn to me for protection when I was the one threatening her.
“Thor, sit!” He relaxed, sat down, and started wagging his tail cheerfully.
I looked down at Noah, who was clutching my T-shirt with both hands. I smiled, but then she seemed to realize what was happening. She raised her hands and shoved me away.
“Are you an idiot or what?”
“First, this better be the last time you try to attack my dog. Second…” As I looked at her, I noticed the freckles on her nose and cheeks. “Don’t ever insult me again or we’re going to have problems.”
Her expression was strange. Her eyes were glued to my face, but then they moved down to my chest, incapable of holding my stare.
I stepped back. My breathing had sped up, but I had no idea why. I’d had enough of her for one day, and I’d only known her for five minutes.
“It would be best if we got along, little sister,” I said, turning my back, grabbing my sandwich off the counter, and heading for the door.
“Don’t call me that. I’m not your sister, not even close,” she replied. She said it with so much hate, so much sincerity, that I stopped to look at her again. Her eyes were shining with determination, and I knew she was no happier than I was about our parents being together.
“Well, we agree about one thing then…little sister,” I repeated, rolling my eyes and enjoying watching her little hands clench into fists.
Just then, I heard laughter behind me. I turned and found myself face-to-face with my father…and his wife.
“I see you’ve met,” my father said, entering the kitchen and smiling from ear to ear. It had been a long time since I’d seen him smile in that way, and honestly, I was happy to see it and happy to know he was rebuilding his life. Even if he’d left something behind on the way: me.
Raffaella smiled at me gently from the door, and I forced myself to make the closest expression to a smile that I could. That was all that woman would get. It wasn’t her fault, I just couldn’t manage anything more.
My father and I didn’t have an affectionate relationship, or much of a relationship at all, but I had been completely in agreement with his building that wall that separated us from the outside world. What had happened with my mother had left its mark on both of us, especially me. I was her son, and I had to watch her leave without looking back.
Since then, I didn’t trust women, I didn’t care about them, andall that mattered to me was sex or maybe having a good time with them at parties. What else should I want?
