Page 106 of Summer, in Between
‘You’re so bossy.’He smiles and slides a finger along my jawline.
‘You love it.’
‘I do.And I love you.’
I lose all track of the conversation and time and gravity and all the fundamentals of life on earth until he pulls away.
‘Let me swap sides.’He lifts himself across to the passenger seat in one motion.Even with me on top of him, it’s like I’m no heavier than a napkin placed across his lap.‘That’s better.’His arms wrap around my body, enclosing me against his skin and for a moment I wonder if you can die from feeling this incredible flush of craving, so acute, so delicious in the pit of my stomach.
Passing headlights illuminate the whole car.I cover my bra with my hands.‘Hope they enjoyed the show.’
‘I know I am,’ Paul says, head back against the seat, his hand on my hip, fingers tracing the arch of my hip bone.
‘It’s got an amazing soundtrack.’Music fills the car, low, the singer almost growling and purring through the speakers, doing nothing to assuage my, well, lust is the only word for what I’m feeling right now.‘What is this, your sexy time playlist?’
‘It is now,’ he says.‘Cat, what are you doing?’
‘Getting comfortable,’ I say, unbuttoning my denim skirt.
‘Yeah, no you’re not.’He stays my hand.‘We probably should get going now, get you home.’
‘Are you freakin’ serious?’I say.‘You want to go?’
‘Leaving is the last thing in the world I want to do.’
‘Well why would you say let’s go?’I grab his face between my hands, my fingers spread wide.‘Here’s the thing: I love you.Do you love me?’
‘You know I do, that’s not even a question.’
‘Why do you keep pushing me away?Are you just not that into me?Because it feels like you are.Seriously.I canfeelyou’re into me, right now.You know what I’m saying?’I look down between us.
‘Cat, I’m so into you I could explode.I really,reallywant to be with you, not just now, not just tonight, but for the long haul.’
‘So, we’re in agreement, because I really,reallywant to be with you too.Likereally, really.I thought me sitting on top of you barely dressed is evidence enough.And you went to all the trouble of making a sexy time playlist.’I lean in to kiss him but he holds my face between his hands.
‘I just don’t want you to feel like I’m pushing you into anything you don’t want to do or that you’re not ready for.’
‘Here we go again.Yes, yes, I get it, you’re so much older and wiser than me.How could I forget?You’re worse than my parents, worse even than Nonna, and she’s the actual worst of the worst.Can you please stop treating me like a child?’
‘So, making sure you’re okay with being together is treating you like a child?It’s called consent, Cat.’
‘Well, I’m giving you my full consent to take off this annoying skirt that’s cutting off my circulation.We’re staying here, and we’re fogging up these windows.’
‘You’re the boss,’ he says.‘They’re pretty fogged up already, though.Look.’He reaches across me, index finger extended.He draws a heart in the condensation, then touches the middle of my chest, the tip of his finger cold against my skin.I shiver.‘I didn’t make a sexy time playlist.But I know for a fact that I won’t be able to hear any of this music ever again without thinking about you and how beautiful you look tonight.I never knew that it was even possible to feel so in love like this.I swear, touching you feels freakin’ sacred.’
My heart rate is spiking, my chest lifting in anticipation ‘Then, touch me.’
