Page 72 of With Stars in Her Eyes
Is it though?
Something inside me had seemed to hesitate at the thought.
“I know this is who you think you are.” His smile shifted in a frown of false pity. A look designed to make me feel like everything I was, everything I had accomplished was the ugliest kind of tarnished trash in comparison to his shiny self-righteousness. “This is what walking away from the church does to a person. You had such a gift. But you could have been so much more if you used it for the—”
“Tell me what you want, or you can get the fuck away from me.” I fumbled with the bed remote and pushed the call button, hoping to summon anyone that could make him leave.
“You want to release a song that rehashes everything from our past because you want to advance your career and because you’re a vindictive little—”
“Leave.”
“I have attorneys who are going to bury you if you try to release it. My father’s attorneys will bury Demetrius too. You thinkthatphoto is bad? We have records that will stir up things hewanted hidden. If you want to riskhis careerjust for a few more minutes basking in the spotlight by telling your ‘little story,’ ask yourself if it’s worth screwing over your friend too.”
“Just leave him alone…”
“He’s enabling this little public tantrum of yours by producing this album just to hurt me, and despite everything my attorneys have already sent him, he’srefusingto see reason. Some scandals stick around in this industry. Grammy voters have long memories. Truth never ends up mattering as much as the headlines.”
“Don’t you dare—”
“Word on the street is that this year would’ve been his year. Highly favored in pretty much every category he’s nominated for… for now. We’ll see.”
Demetrius had racked up dozens of Grammy nominations and never won.Gilded Shadows, the album the Violet Trikes released last year, was supposed to be the album that finally won.
“What if… what if I pull out of the tour? What if I don’t release it?” My eyes were blurred with tears that humiliated me more than anything else. I mustered the passive stoicism that I’d learned from my mother and shut that shit down. My voice was measured when I found it again. “Will you leave him alone if I don’t put out my album? I can tell them I changed my mind.”
“I’ll consider it.” His bottom lip pushed outward like he was judging prized pigs at a country fair. “Honestly, after watching everything go down in that show, I’m shocked you ever want to get onstage again. That kind of thing can get in a lot of performers’ heads. Maybe I shouldn’t have even bothered to come out here to check on you.”
I looked down at my hands and balled them into fists.
He shook his head, attention flicking toward the door like he heard someone outside the room. He leaned closer and gave my shoulder a pat before I could twist away from the contact. “Happens once and people might forgive you, but if it happens again,shew-wee.Thatwould be difficult to come back from. Especially if the toxicology screening were to leak. People are so suspiciousof cover-ups these days.” Without another word, Jeremiah walked out of the room.
I signed everything the nurse asked me to sign without reading it. I lied when the nurse asked about having a ride. My checking account was nearly empty after a few big expenses, so I didn’t want to buy another plane ticket. I left most of my equipment in Demetrius’s rental house. I stuffed my duffel bag with what I could, including the small but heavy collection of books I had been picking up whenever I could during my travels. After an unforgivably short text to Demetrius, I grabbed my bags and started to price out the cheapest bus tickets that would get me to Kansas.
I had just locked the door behind me when a tall shadow blocked out the sunlight. I whirled around in a panic, which subsided the moment I took in the face in front of me. “Nic?” I dropped my large duffel.
He pulled me into a tight hug.
“How did you…?” The words shook.
He held on to my arms as if he was worried I would fall over. “You didn’t think you could run away from LA again without your favorite road trip buddy, right?” Nic rubbed the stubble on his chin. “I’ve been itching for another road trip anyway.”
“But sorry, I already called shotgun,” another voice said, just as unexpected. I blinked away my tears and found Sam behind him.
I sank to the ground and cried all the tears I had held back in the hospital.
Sam wrapped me in her arms while Nic lifted my bags from the ground and carried them down to the sidewalk. He went back in and grabbed all the rest of the things I had left because I couldn’t bring them on the bus. Through my blurred vision, I could make out his enormous double-cab truck parked on the street. He’d driven all the way here?
“When did you get here?”
“We missed you at the hospital. It’s my fault. My flight was delayed, and Nic was picking me up from the airport first. Hey… what’s… I know things are bad, but…” Sam read something inmy face, looking like she understood far more than she should be able to. “It’s going to be okay. Everything’s going to be all right, okay? You’re going to be okay, Courtney.”
I settled into the crook of my best friend’s neck, feeling like a creep because of how much the smell of Sam’s perfume put me at ease.
Nic loaded my stuff in the back, and we headed out on the road.
I had told Thea I knew Nic and Sam would drop everything if I needed them.
Because they already had.
