Page 77 of Invisible String
Alight breeze tickles my arm with a soft brush, like a warm hug. I kneel on the grass at the cemetery. The arrangement I bought for her has wilted, so I add a fresh assorted bouquet. A tear runs down my cheek. For the past days, I’ve been talking my ears off to her about Max. Oh, she loved Max even when I told her he didn’t love me back. Her words were, “He’s a good guy. Give him time. He’ll come around.” Four years. It took him four years to show up. Did I expect it? No. I have no clue what he wanted or what he thought, like we were going to pick up where we left off—screwing.
My heart shattered into pieces as I lied, saying I didn’t love him. It needs to be guarded. I refuse to let him in, even though my body yearns for his touch, the rough, calloused fingers grazing against my lips. His scent and touch are an addiction that will lure me into his muscular, ripped, tattooed arms. The veins pulsing deliciously in his hands. He appeared too well put together. The cut on his cheek was nothing more than a scab. Damn, he was so fucking gorgeous. He was dressed as if he had just come out of a business meeting, in pressed black trousers and a silk-like button-down shirt. My fingers itched to squeeze his bulked biceps, but I knew better.
“Rainey,” a familiar voice calls out, the grass crunching as he walks toward me.
“Dad,” I say, my tone dry. He kneels next to me and lays a single rose on her tomb. We are silent for five long minutes.
Until he says, “I know you don’t want to hear me. But I love you, Rainey. I miss my family. I’ve made mistakes. I’m not perfect. God knows I’m paying for my mistakes. I miss your mother so much.” His throat works and grips my knee. “I miss my little girls. Maybe we can go out to have breakfast sometime. I would love for us to patch things up. We can work on bringing our family together.”
My fingers wrap around strands of grass. “We had a family, a perfect, beautiful family, but you chose work, money, and fame and slept with the woman in your office instead of coming home to Mom. When she was sick, you worked later hours at the office to be the leading defense attorney in Nevada and build your team. Winning cases was much more important than spending every day with your wife. You could have worked from home, but you chose not to. Now she’s gone, and the guilt is killing you.”
I stand, and my dad raises his furrowed brows.
“I love you, Dad, but right now, I can’t seem to let go of the anger I have for you. Maybe someday we can try, but now is not the time. The wounds are fresh, and I miss her so much it hurts.”
He nods, his lips pressed in a line.
We part ways, and I drive home. My sister waits, still in her pajamas. When I left, she was sound asleep. Waking her up is pointless. She sleeps like a hibernating bear.
“Where did you run off to?”
“Went to see Mom.” I sit next to her, leaning my head on her shoulder. “Tell me about your boyfriend. I heard you giggle from the bedroom.” I lean my head back farther to peer at her.
“Uhh. He’s handsome. Smart. Funny. Oh, that accent. Rainey, you need to move with me. That’s the reason I came tosweep you away. You’re missing out.” She pulls her phone out, scrolls through it, and shows me a picture of her hot boyfriend. “See. Those eyes are so dreamy. He tells me shit I don’t understand, but damn, it’s hot.”
“He’s probably telling you that you snore and your feet smell, and you’re getting wet about it.”
She snorts. “He does massage my feet.”
“He’s a good-looking guy. You two look like the sweetest couple.”
She sighs with puppy love. She is only twenty, close to the same age when I fell hard for Max the second time around.
“Thanks. He’s great.” She nudges me. “Isabella told me Andrew’s been dropping in at the café. Are you guys together?”
“No…he’s been a lot more…patient. Since that night.”
My sister and Lana came over the night after. When I told them where Andrew had taken me and who we saw fighting, they were shocked. When I got to the part where Andrew undressed me, and I crumbled on the floor crying, they gave me sympathetic, sad faces.
“I guess you didn’t scare him off. Did I even ask you why you broke down?”
I laugh, amused, now that I think about it. If I were all over a guy and he broke down in tears, I would freak out and ask what was going on. Andrew was more into himself. Wanting to fuck me. “No, it didn’t. All he said to me the following time we saw each other was that he would wait until I was ready.” I shrug.
“He’s odd. Did he ask why you reacted that way? He hasn’t seen you with a guy, so he probably thinks you’re a virgin.”
A wild laugh rolls from my lips. It didn’t cross my mind. He must think that. I haven’t been with anyone he has noticeably seen. “Far from it. I mean, I am not an expert here, but I had a man, and he ruined it for anyone else.”
Bethany tilts her head in a sorrowful smile. “I understand what you mean now, Rainey. I didn’t then… You know, let’s not talk about him. You need to move on at some point, and talking about him will not help.”
Move on.How is that even possible? He fills my mind with memories, especially now that I’ve seen him again. His face is on social media, for God’s sake. I might hate him, but I’m proud he’s come this far to know he had a dream to fight professionally, and he’s accomplishing it. There’s no doubt in my mind he will succeed.
“Get dressed. Lana is meeting us for lunch,” I tell my baby sister.
She yawns, not adjusted to the different time zones.
A few minutes later, we make it to the tavern. It’s Sunday, and the bakery is closed. I’ll reconsider opening on Sundays when I hire another employee who isn’t my sister to fill in and help. Lana sits in a corner booth, dipping her tortilla chip in salsa.
“Finally. I’m already on my second basket of chips, girls. I’m hungry.”
