Page 36 of One Chance to Stay
“It’s good.”
“What are you studying?”
“Biology. But it’s my first year, so I have to take all the gen-ed courses.”
“I hated that. My psychology class was in one of those huge lecture halls. I don’t think I talked to the professor once.”
“Same. The introduction to biology course only had about fifty people in it. I hear they get a lot smaller in the second semester.”
“Wait till senior year.” I laughed. “You’ll be lucky if you have more than a dozen people. We used to have study group sessions at the professor’s house.”
He raised an eyebrow. “That’s weird.”
“Now that I said it out loud, yes, it is. I went to school in Bangor. The professor lived down the street from me. I grewup with his daughter. Very different world going to school in Maine.”
“Yeah, that’s why I left. We live in Naples and…” He shrugged.
“You needed to get out. I get it. Someday you’ll think about coming back.”
“I don’t know about that.”
“Just wait.” I wiggled my eyebrows. “Once a Mainer?—”
“Always a Mainer,” he finished. “So, Mom keeps telling me.”
“What’s the goal after school?”
The teen shrugged. It could mean anything from “I don’t know” to “Are we really talking about this?” Of course, I refused to let it go. It might have had something to do with my inner dialogue about the future.
“Doctor? Research? Teaching?”
“I think research… maybe. I love biology and chemistry, so maybe something with those? My parents are getting annoyed that I haven’t figured it out.”
I knew that voice. The weight of it. It sounded a lot like mine, just twenty years younger. I couldn’t help but chuckle. Jackson’s eyebrow crept up his forehead. I waved my hands, so he knew I wasn’t laughing at him. “I’m approaching forty and I don’t have it figured out.”
“What do you do?”
“I’m a bartender.”
“That’s cool.”
“It was.”
“What’s next?”
I mirrored his earlier shrug. “That’s a great question. I’m still figuring out the answer.”
“I have the rest of my life to figure it out, you know?” Not only did I know, I had reached the point where I needed to answer thequestion. He had time to experiment and make mistakes. He’d figure it out, and if he didn’t, it wasn’t the end of the?—
“Whoa.” My advice had lifted a boulder that had been holding me in place.
“Whoa?”
“Do what makes you happy. If it’s not right for you, there’s always the next thing.” I sat taller as the weight lifted from my shoulders. I had been drowning as I thought the next decision had to be therightone. Without the absolutism of it, I could experiment. If I got it wrong, there’d be the next time.
“Jackson,” Evelyn shouted from the top floor. “Your room is ready!”
He got up and gave a little wave. “I’m sure I’ll see you around.”
