Page 87 of Ruthless Commander
But it wasn’t that place.
It was something else.
Maybe it was me?
I searched those brown eyes, then lowered my gaze to the laptop on his knees. “Working on something?”
“A little consulting work, nothing major.”
“Consulting.” I made for the sofa and sank down onto the black velvet cushion next to him. “You didn’t tell me you were doing consulting work.”
He gave a scowl, then turned toward me. “I didn’t think it’d be an issue.”
“It isn’t.” I gave a shrug. God, I sounded like I was nagging. “Just wish I’d known is all.”
I wish you’d let me in.
That was the issue. He’d shut me out and this…consultation workwas just one more thing. I gave a sigh and rose. “Are you hungry? I’ll make us some dinner.”
“Sure. Let me help.”
He did, seasoning the steaks. I winced at the smell of the meat and turned away, resisting the urge to gag.Jesus…what the fuck was wrong with me?Those two red lines rose to slap me in the face.Oh, that’s right.
“Xael?”
I turned back, pasted a smile on my face. “Just feeling a little off.”
That perpetual scowl deepened as he turned instantly, washing his hands at the sink before coming my way. He pressed the back of his hand against my forehead. “Are you sick?”
I smiled and shook my head. “No. Maybe I’m just a little fatigued. Someone has been getting up every night in the middle of the night. Don’t know who that is, do you?”
My pulse was racing as he winced and lowered his hand, taking the bait. “I thought I was quiet.”
“Not quiet enough.”
“Apparently.”
“Want to tell me what’s going on with you?”
He gave a deep sigh. “I wish to hell I knew.” He rubbed the back of his neck, then turned to the meat. I clenched my fists, stilling the shakes. That was close. Too damn close, and I had no idea why I was so scared to tell him.
“I just feel restless. Have been like this for a while now. I think it’s…I think it’s—”
“Go on.”
Say it…the words rose.Say what’s really keeping you up. You want out, don’t you? You want out of this life and back into the Commission. You were made for that life. Not this one…not the one where you’re a—
“I think I just need to find a hobby or something to occupy my time.”
I turned away. “A hobby like the Commission, you mean?”
“What? No, not the Commission. Why the hell would you think that?”
I turned back, facing the real issue head on. “Because a man like you was made for violence, Mateo. A man like you was made for more than…this.”I gestured with my hand and looked around.
Our house was immaculate.
Expensive.
