Page 170 of Paradox
Ignoring my dick, I rub it over my own rim and force my middle finger inside because I just can't take it anymore.
I don't know why I was embarrassed to tell him.
I don't know why I thought he wouldn't be interested.
But after seeing how turned on he was when I mentioned it this morning, I know I need it.
I need to know what he feels like.
I need him to fuck me as well.
I hiss and dig my fingernails into my thigh to keep myself grounded.
My finger sinks deeper. Pumps. Then deeper again.
Watching Jin is like nothing else.
This is dangerous.
This is better than I imagined.
I'd have fucking killed him if I saw him like this back then.
Desperate for more, I add a second finger.
Jin is relentless. The sounds he's making. How fast he's moving.
Drawn to keep up with him, I speed up, too.
My head falls back.
I lose focus.
"Eden."
What?
"Eden?"
I look at Jin. He's not moving. It's not inside him anymore.
His face is flushed, and curious.
"Are… Are you?" he says softly, raising himself up and crawling to me.
Kneeling in front of me—the vibrator, off, in his left hand—he puts his right hand on my bicep then follows my arm the whole way down and around my body.
"Fuck," he pants out, and I feel no shame. "I wanna see you use it."
Jin takes my wrist and brings it around to my front. I look down at my hand and how the light from the cab is reflecting off my glistening fingers.
He hands me the vibrator. "Show me."
I don't say anything, I don't even nod, I just do as I'm asked.
I reach into the toiletries bag, take out a condom, and put it on the vibrator.
Jin holds my face. "Look at me while you do it."
